This week's You Capture topic over at I Should Be Folding Laundry is Joy. I didn't take any photos for this week's challenge. I kept on trying to think of things that really bring me joy, and I was at a loss. That's not to say that I don't have things that make me happy...Spending time with friends, cooking/eating a nice meal, hanging out with Hubby, playing WoW (sometimes), having a clean house...They all make me happy, but I just can't come up with anything that really makes me feel joyous. I haven't looked at any of the other posters' photos, but I have a feeling that many of their ideas of joy will be photos of their beautiful children with huge smiles... Which, as of late, has the exact opposite effect on me.
Unfortunately, so much of my time is spent feeling envious. A good majority of the blogs that I read (and really ENJOY) are written by women that are mothers. I found out this weekend that two of my sorority sisters are pregnant. I feel like every time I turn around, someone else is having a baby. And I feel so ... jealous. I want to be happy for everyone. And I am. And I wish them all the best. But at the same time, I can't help this feeling of why not me? I know I have time (though not as much as I'd like). And as an old friend put it 'good things are worth the wait.' But haven't you ever wanted something so badly that it hurt? And you just sit and watch so many others around you that have been blessed with this amazing gift?
Hubby says he's not ready. I don't believe him. He were trying two years ago. He made the announcement to our families that we were going to start trying to get pregnant. And then I don't know what happened. Maybe he came to his senses. Or maybe he freaked out. Or...I don't know...
It's not like we're using any kind of protection. I've been off the pill since we got married. He's never used anything. I try to keep track of my cycle, and Lord knows that when I think I'm ovulating, I make the first move. But it's obviously not enough. I don't know if the problem is with me - For a long time, my periods were very irregular. I saw a doctor about a year ago, who gave me a prescription which got me back on track. But I never went back to the doc. I don't know if I'm actually ovulating. And then Hubby...Like I said, he doesn't use any protection. But he does have this habit that's said to lower a man's sperm count...
I'm almost two weeks late. I was quite sick on Tuesday - stayed home from work. I was kind of excited and really should've waited, but I peed on the stick anyway. It came back negative. So, am I just stressing myself out, thinking about it all the time, and that's what's causing me to be late? Maybe the test was wrong? (Insert wishful thinking here) Yesterday, when I came in to work, I was talking about it with my girlfriend in the office, and she went and googled signs of pregnancy. She was asking which symptoms I was experiencing. Some I had, others I didn't.
I just want this so badly. I hate feeling so envious. I keep trying to tell myself that in time, it will happen. Just keep on keeping on and you'll get there. My parents were 30 when they had me, so I guess I have time. But I'm tired of waiting.
Thursday, April 30, 2009
Thursday, April 23, 2009
You Capture - Letters
O.M.G. This week's You Capture was really challenging!!! Like more so than last week's rustic challenge. The topic for this week was 'Letters'. I was really straining my brain to come up with ideas.
My first thought was letters, like at the post office. I hadn't yet been to my local post office (we just moved in September - give me a break!), so I swung by on my way home yesterday (damn the rain!!!) and when I got there was quite disappointed. Living in a small farm town, I should have known better. The post office was just a house. Literally, an old house with a couple mailboxes outside. So, I dropped that idea. It really wasn't what I was going for. My backup plan, which I'd dropped before I even got to the post office, was photos of graffiti. I love how it looks - I think it's very artistic - and if I had the right opportunity, I'd take TONS of shots. However, that would probably require me going to some unsavory part of town. And that's not something that I'm thrilled about doing on my own.
Sooo...As I'm driving home from the post office, it came to me! I'd walk around the neighborhood and come up with photos to represent each letter in the alphabet. A is for Apple, style.
I ended up not getting all 26 letters, but here's what I did get. I think I might finish this at a later date...I really am happy with the idea that I came up with.
A is for abandoned...This bike was just laying there all alone. No kids in sight. There aren't any houses nearby.
My first thought was letters, like at the post office. I hadn't yet been to my local post office (we just moved in September - give me a break!), so I swung by on my way home yesterday (damn the rain!!!) and when I got there was quite disappointed. Living in a small farm town, I should have known better. The post office was just a house. Literally, an old house with a couple mailboxes outside. So, I dropped that idea. It really wasn't what I was going for. My backup plan, which I'd dropped before I even got to the post office, was photos of graffiti. I love how it looks - I think it's very artistic - and if I had the right opportunity, I'd take TONS of shots. However, that would probably require me going to some unsavory part of town. And that's not something that I'm thrilled about doing on my own.
Sooo...As I'm driving home from the post office, it came to me! I'd walk around the neighborhood and come up with photos to represent each letter in the alphabet. A is for Apple, style.
I ended up not getting all 26 letters, but here's what I did get. I think I might finish this at a later date...I really am happy with the idea that I came up with.
A is for abandoned...This bike was just laying there all alone. No kids in sight. There aren't any houses nearby. 
B is for Baseball Diamond
C is for Cat...Woofy was waiting in the window for me when I got home!
E is for Easter Bunny...I'm a little slow to put away my decorations...So what?
G is for Garbage Day
H is for Home Sweet Home (not mine...But someone's!)
K is for Kite
L is for Lightpost
M is for Mother's Love...My girlfriend from work brought her daughter in to work last week...I just love the way she's smiling at her baby girl.
N is for New Life...I can't wait to see how this tree in my front yard looks when these buds open up!!!
P is for Pinecones
R is for Red
S is for Sunny
Z is for Zebra...I really liked how these folks' grass looks like a zebra print...Maybe I wouldn't like it so much if it were my own grass, which is still brown, btw.
I'd love to hear what you think! And for more unique representations of 'Letters,' go on over to:
Friday, April 17, 2009
Dear Mom,
To my readers: this is a letter that I intend to give to my mom. I talked about doing this on Monday.
Dear Mom,
I'm writing you this letter for a number of reasons. I have always felt like I had a difficult time expressing myself when it comes to communicating face to face. I always seem to be better organized and actually able to get my point across when I put things down on paper (I should be honest - you know I'm typing it...It's what I do. :-)). I must get this from you - Daddy never seems to have this problem. He always seems to know the right things to say.
I'm writing this letter to you because I've realized that there's a lot of things that I feel and say to other people that I've never outwardly expressed to you. I tell you all the time that I love you, and I mean it so very much. But I don't think I've ever told you how inspirational you are to me. Or how proud you make me. Or how thankful I am every time I see you and spend time with you. I've never apologized for all of the shitty things that I did when I was a teenger. I've never acknowledged all that you've given up for me. And I've never told you how sorry I am that MS has taken so much from you.
I don't tell you these things because, frankly, I don't know how. It's much easier to just be happy to hang out together when I come visit than it is to tell you everything I'm feeling. I feel like there's only so much time, and I don't want to spend it crying. I don't want to upset you. I want you to be happy that I'm there and happy to see me, rather than
Whenever I've had a friend that asked about MS, I tried my best to explain it, and have always ended my story with something along the lines of 'Yes, it sucks. MS is a bitch. But you have to try to find the silver lining. And my silver lining is that as a kid, I always had someone waiting for me. I never had to worry about having a house key and being alone at night because I knew my mom would be there. My silver lining is that I have an incredible relationship with my grandparents that I absolutely cherish. And I think had it not been for the MS, they wouldn't have moved back to the south burbs. And they would've just been my mom's parents, who I saw on holidays. My silver lining is that while I watched so many of my friends' parents get divorced, mine stayed together. The love that they have for one another is like none that I've ever seen.'
I'm not trying to make light of it, or make it seem like we're better off because of the MS. I know there have been times where you felt like you let me down because you weren't physically able to do something. That stupid rollerskating party with the girlscouts. Yeah, I was bummed about it, but the only reason I still remember that event is because of how upset you were that you couldn't take me there.
That being said, I'm not writing to tell you how I think I'm like you, but to tell you the ways in which I hope to be like you. In the simple things, like your creativity. The beautiful quilts that you've made and the painted wood pieces that you've done. The clothing that you used to sew (even though I didn't appreciate it at the time).
But even more importantly, I can only hope that I can be half as strong as you've been in your life. I often feel like I am a weak person. I give up easily and take the easy road because I'm not willing to put in the effort. But I look at you, and the things that you've struggled with, and I feel like I should push myself harder. You haven't had an easy life, why should I feel like everything should just be handed to me?
It's very important to me that you know how proud of you I am. And what an inspiration to me you are. I know that you've made many, many sacrifices for me. And I know that I wasn't always the best about showing you the appreciation you deserved.
I want to apologize to you. There were many times that I took advantage of you and the situation. I thought I had all the answers and I always turned to Daddy when I wanted something. When I look back now, I don't think I was a bad kid, but I don't think I was a great kid, either. There are so many things and ways that I could have been better. I'm so sorry if I've let you down. I hope you know that I never meant to disappoint you and Dad when I screwed up in college. I didn't know what I wanted to do and I was scared. Rather than try to figure it all out, I just quit. Again, I took the easy road.
Quickie
Not what you think...You dirty birds. :-P
My mom's back in the hospital. Dad sent a text this morning saying that she went there yesterday and was admitted. She had high blood pressure, a high temp and was complaining of nausea. Not sure what it's all coming from - she did have a pretty bad UTI last week, but they were treating it with an antibiotic. Anyway, Dad said she's doing okay, but they're going to keep her at the hospital, at least over the weekend.
Please say some prayers that she does come home soon. The longer she's in the hospital, the worse things seem to get.
My mom's back in the hospital. Dad sent a text this morning saying that she went there yesterday and was admitted. She had high blood pressure, a high temp and was complaining of nausea. Not sure what it's all coming from - she did have a pretty bad UTI last week, but they were treating it with an antibiotic. Anyway, Dad said she's doing okay, but they're going to keep her at the hospital, at least over the weekend.
Please say some prayers that she does come home soon. The longer she's in the hospital, the worse things seem to get.
I have a love/hate relationship with Fridays...
I LOVE knowing that the weekend is just around the corner...But I HATE trying to pass the last 8 hours of the work week. I swear, I've been at work for four hours and I've actually worked for about 45 minutes. Yay email, Facebook and the wonderful world of blogging.
Anyway, in an attempt to pass some more time before doing any more work, I'm stealing a new meme from Muffs. Thankyouverymuch.
1) Single, Taken, or Crushing?
Definitely taken, but I have a huge crush on Josh Holloway from Lost (Sawyer). I was just reading up on Lost earlier this week and learned that the next season will be the last! I will be very sad when that happens. I want them to stay on the island forever. Or better yet, I'll just find my way to the island with Sawyer and everyone else can go home.
2) Are you happy with where you are?
Physically...I could be happier if I weren't at work, but I like to pay the bills, so I'm okay with it. In the metaphoric sense (as Jamie so aptly put it), yeah, I'm pretty happy. I'm really jonesin' for a kid, but I can continue to be patient...for a while.
3) When you meet the right person, do you fall fast?
Yeah. Before I was married, if the guy was nice enough and showed boyfriend potential, it didn't take long before I was head over heels.
4) Have you ever had your heart broken?
I don't know that I have. I mean, when I was younger, I know I went through some breakups that really hurt. No, wait. I take that back. I definitely have. My first real boyfriend. I was totally smitten with the guy. Geez, I would've done anything for him. And he broke up with me over an IM. I couldn't even get a phone call. It totally came out of the blue, as far as I was concerned. I never really did find out why we broke up. I have to admit, I still look for him on Facebook every once in a while, hoping that I can at least see what he looks like now. I started to say that I hope he's ugly and miserable now, but I really don't. I hope he's happy in life - everyone deserves that.
5) Do you believe that there are certain circumstances where cheating is ok?
I don't believe that it's okay. When you make a commitment to someone, stick to it. And if you don't want to stick to it, then don't stay in the relationship.
6) Would you ever take someone back if they cheated on you?
I would like to say no, but I'd be lying. Hubby and I went through some tough times in our past, and I did take him back. It was a long time ago, and people grow up. I don't agree with the statement 'Once a cheater, always a cheater.' You learn from your mistakes and you change.
7) Have you talked about marriage with another person?
Duh.
8) Do you want children?
Again, duh.
9) How many?
I'd be happy with one right now, but eventually, I'd like to have two.
10) Would you consider adoption?
If we couldn't have our own, I definitely would.
11) If somebody liked you right now, what do you think is a cool way to let you know?
They should send me a note which says 'I like you. Do you like me? Check Yes, No or Maybe' LOL!
12) Do you enjoy playing hard to get?
Pfft.
13) Be honest, do you play the "game" when you are dating?
Um...I don't think I know what that is...God, I feel old.
14) Do you believe love at first sight exists?
I used to...I think I've become jaded in my old age. lol Really, I think love is something that develops over time. And it changes, too. I love my husband in a much different way than I did 9 years ago (ew...really? nine years?)
15) Are you romantic?
At heart, absolutely. In reality, no way. I'm too lazy to be romantic. And my husband wouldn't know romantic if I threw it at him.
16) Do you believe that you can change someone?
No - a person can only change if THEY want it.
17) If you could get married anywhere, money not an object where would it be?
If I could've gotten married anywhere, it would've been exactly where I did get married. A place that I felt was home to me. I might have had a more low-key reception...Like a BBQ back at the house or something. I found that after I did the whole big shabang thing, I wished I'd taken that money and spent it elsewhere.
18) Do you have feelings for someone right now?
Sure, I've got feelings for all kinds of people! ;-)
19) Have you ever wished you could've had someone but you couldn't?
Yes. Oh Lordy, did I ever. There were a couple guys that I wanted to love so badly...One that I never had the balls to say something to, and one that wasn't at all interested. I'm glad I didn't though. Who knows where I'd be now.
20) Have you ever broken a heart?
Yes, I'm pretty sure that I have. Not that I intentionally said, "Hm...I think I'm going to go in bitch mode and break B's heart." I just thought the grass was greener on the other side. Once I figured out that it wasn't, it was too late.
21) Would you ever fight somebody over your significant other?
Fight someone...? I dunno. I have never been in a fight. But I guess if it came down to it, I would.
22)What would you say about your last ex?
He's a great guy. And I'm sorry if I've ever done anything to hurt him. We've remained sorta neutral friends over the last few years. I try to keep up with him, but he doesn't respond much. That might be his current gf's wishes. Or he might just not give a shit. I care for him and I hope that he finds happiness.
Anyway, in an attempt to pass some more time before doing any more work, I'm stealing a new meme from Muffs. Thankyouverymuch.
1) Single, Taken, or Crushing?
Definitely taken, but I have a huge crush on Josh Holloway from Lost (Sawyer). I was just reading up on Lost earlier this week and learned that the next season will be the last! I will be very sad when that happens. I want them to stay on the island forever. Or better yet, I'll just find my way to the island with Sawyer and everyone else can go home.
2) Are you happy with where you are?
Physically...I could be happier if I weren't at work, but I like to pay the bills, so I'm okay with it. In the metaphoric sense (as Jamie so aptly put it), yeah, I'm pretty happy. I'm really jonesin' for a kid, but I can continue to be patient...for a while.
3) When you meet the right person, do you fall fast?
Yeah. Before I was married, if the guy was nice enough and showed boyfriend potential, it didn't take long before I was head over heels.
4) Have you ever had your heart broken?
I don't know that I have. I mean, when I was younger, I know I went through some breakups that really hurt. No, wait. I take that back. I definitely have. My first real boyfriend. I was totally smitten with the guy. Geez, I would've done anything for him. And he broke up with me over an IM. I couldn't even get a phone call. It totally came out of the blue, as far as I was concerned. I never really did find out why we broke up. I have to admit, I still look for him on Facebook every once in a while, hoping that I can at least see what he looks like now. I started to say that I hope he's ugly and miserable now, but I really don't. I hope he's happy in life - everyone deserves that.
5) Do you believe that there are certain circumstances where cheating is ok?
I don't believe that it's okay. When you make a commitment to someone, stick to it. And if you don't want to stick to it, then don't stay in the relationship.
6) Would you ever take someone back if they cheated on you?
I would like to say no, but I'd be lying. Hubby and I went through some tough times in our past, and I did take him back. It was a long time ago, and people grow up. I don't agree with the statement 'Once a cheater, always a cheater.' You learn from your mistakes and you change.
7) Have you talked about marriage with another person?
Duh.
8) Do you want children?
Again, duh.
9) How many?
I'd be happy with one right now, but eventually, I'd like to have two.
10) Would you consider adoption?
If we couldn't have our own, I definitely would.
11) If somebody liked you right now, what do you think is a cool way to let you know?
They should send me a note which says 'I like you. Do you like me? Check Yes, No or Maybe' LOL!
12) Do you enjoy playing hard to get?
Pfft.
13) Be honest, do you play the "game" when you are dating?
Um...I don't think I know what that is...God, I feel old.
14) Do you believe love at first sight exists?
I used to...I think I've become jaded in my old age. lol Really, I think love is something that develops over time. And it changes, too. I love my husband in a much different way than I did 9 years ago (ew...really? nine years?)
15) Are you romantic?
At heart, absolutely. In reality, no way. I'm too lazy to be romantic. And my husband wouldn't know romantic if I threw it at him.
16) Do you believe that you can change someone?
No - a person can only change if THEY want it.
17) If you could get married anywhere, money not an object where would it be?
If I could've gotten married anywhere, it would've been exactly where I did get married. A place that I felt was home to me. I might have had a more low-key reception...Like a BBQ back at the house or something. I found that after I did the whole big shabang thing, I wished I'd taken that money and spent it elsewhere.
18) Do you have feelings for someone right now?
Sure, I've got feelings for all kinds of people! ;-)
19) Have you ever wished you could've had someone but you couldn't?
Yes. Oh Lordy, did I ever. There were a couple guys that I wanted to love so badly...One that I never had the balls to say something to, and one that wasn't at all interested. I'm glad I didn't though. Who knows where I'd be now.
20) Have you ever broken a heart?
Yes, I'm pretty sure that I have. Not that I intentionally said, "Hm...I think I'm going to go in bitch mode and break B's heart." I just thought the grass was greener on the other side. Once I figured out that it wasn't, it was too late.
21) Would you ever fight somebody over your significant other?
Fight someone...? I dunno. I have never been in a fight. But I guess if it came down to it, I would.
22)What would you say about your last ex?
He's a great guy. And I'm sorry if I've ever done anything to hurt him. We've remained sorta neutral friends over the last few years. I try to keep up with him, but he doesn't respond much. That might be his current gf's wishes. Or he might just not give a shit. I care for him and I hope that he finds happiness.
Thursday, April 16, 2009
You Capture - Rustic
Wow! Was this week's You Capture difficult!!! The topic was rustic. When I first saw that last week, I thought 'What does that word really even mean...?' When I think of rustic, I think of old log cabins, lots of wood and certain foods. Actually, when I fantasize about owning my own restaurant, I think rustic would be a very good term to describe what I see in my head. Kinda log cabin-ish, dark colors, heavy comfort food, like beef stew and homemade mac n cheese. But what to photograph for this challenge? The more I thought about it, the more I thought about things like old barns or old wooden farm houses. My town is totally surrounded by farms, so I thought this could be easier than I'd first expected. And I had the idea to actually make some beef stew for dinner this week. And then Wednesday night was already here and I hadn't gotten a chance to take the photos (or make the stew) that I'd been planning in my head. Doh.
That being said, I did take a couple shots at my parents' house on Sunday. That sunroom that I mentioned in my crazy dream is all made of wood on the inside. My mom's got a country kind of style, so I took advantage and got a couple shots there.
Cowbell that hangs in the sunroom...I thought it was kinda rusticky...Yes? No? :-)
Wood is rustic...Wood comes from trees...I really just like the angles in this shot.
My final rustic photo. I like this one a lot, too. I don't remember where this bird house came from...Something my mom picked up at one time, I'm sure. I'm going to say this is my favorite one this week because I feel it best represents the topic.
Wednesday, April 15, 2009
Belated Writing Prompt - Time Machine
Last week, at Twenty Something Writers, the following prompt was provided:
You’ve just been given a time machine. You can only use it once, to go back to day in your past and relive it or change something. What day would you go back to, what would you change and why?
I've read all the other writers' blogs and found it interesting that the day most people chose to relive was focused around the passing of someone that had been near and dear to them. They each wanted to focus not on changing something, but just having one more day with that person. I can certainly understand that desire. And I'm sure if I had a similar loss, I would probably feel the same way. But I, thankfully, have not had to go through that. The only family member that has passed on was my grandfather on my dad's side. And while I was upset, I wasn't terribly close to him and the loss did not impact me enough to want to relive a day with him. As a matter of fact, I feel like I didn't know him very well at all. He died when I was 19 and I knew very little about the man.
Anyway, back to the topic at hand, if I had one day to relive, I think I would go back to the day that I decided that I wanted to change my major to business.
I had started my college career with the idea of eventually becoming a choir director. I loved to sing and in high school, choir and theatre were a huge part of my life. The end of high school was incredibly rough on me (I don't do so well with change) and my way to deal with that was to try to get back there as soon as I could. The problem was that to become a choir director, it's so much more than singing for four years. It's pretty much a double major in music & education. And in addition to that, you can't go into being a choir director and only be able to sing. You also need to be able to play the piano. I took lessons for a while in my senior year of high school, but it takes a lot of practice. You don't just learn how to play an instrument in a couple months. And certainly not when you're as un-dedicated as I was. I mean, I can read music and I can tap out the melody of a song on a keyboard. But I just became overwhelmed. My freshman year in college was nothing like what I expected it to be.
One night, after my roommate and I had just come to blows (not physically, but emotionally, we just weren't on the same page anymore), I was having a particularly hard time. I wanted to give up completely. I was feeling very lonely, I wanted to go home where I felt loved, and it didn't matter if I could play the piano or sing the high notes or any of that. I was stressed like I never had been before. I remember talking to Hubby on the phone (he was away at school in Wyoming at the time) and telling him how much I hated it. How much I didn't want to be there any more. How music education wasn't for me. And he suggested that I go into business. My dad worked(still does) in the business world and he's been very successful. I thought at that time that Daddy could just get me a job when I had a business degree.
I think maybe that's when I stopped making my own decisions. I thought Hubby sounded convincing enough, so I went with it. I decided to change my major to business that night and stuck with it for another five years. And now, I work at a job that has very little to do with the education that I received. And neither the job nor the education are even what I want to be doing. Don't get me wrong, I enjoy my job most of the time, and I don't plan on leaving any time soon. In fact, I'm working on furthering myself here.
But, if I could go back and relive that day, I'd probably still call the Hubs and my dad and bawl my eyes out. I'd ask them both what I should do and beg them to make the decision for me. But in the end, I'd think it over more. What is it that I want to do? How can I be successful, but still be happy about what I'm doing? What can I do that will challenge me and keep my interest? I think I would've found that if I'd pushed myself a little harder, I could have come up with so many more options. Maybe I would've ended up in the same place that I am now, but maybe not...
You’ve just been given a time machine. You can only use it once, to go back to day in your past and relive it or change something. What day would you go back to, what would you change and why?
I've read all the other writers' blogs and found it interesting that the day most people chose to relive was focused around the passing of someone that had been near and dear to them. They each wanted to focus not on changing something, but just having one more day with that person. I can certainly understand that desire. And I'm sure if I had a similar loss, I would probably feel the same way. But I, thankfully, have not had to go through that. The only family member that has passed on was my grandfather on my dad's side. And while I was upset, I wasn't terribly close to him and the loss did not impact me enough to want to relive a day with him. As a matter of fact, I feel like I didn't know him very well at all. He died when I was 19 and I knew very little about the man.
Anyway, back to the topic at hand, if I had one day to relive, I think I would go back to the day that I decided that I wanted to change my major to business.
I had started my college career with the idea of eventually becoming a choir director. I loved to sing and in high school, choir and theatre were a huge part of my life. The end of high school was incredibly rough on me (I don't do so well with change) and my way to deal with that was to try to get back there as soon as I could. The problem was that to become a choir director, it's so much more than singing for four years. It's pretty much a double major in music & education. And in addition to that, you can't go into being a choir director and only be able to sing. You also need to be able to play the piano. I took lessons for a while in my senior year of high school, but it takes a lot of practice. You don't just learn how to play an instrument in a couple months. And certainly not when you're as un-dedicated as I was. I mean, I can read music and I can tap out the melody of a song on a keyboard. But I just became overwhelmed. My freshman year in college was nothing like what I expected it to be.
One night, after my roommate and I had just come to blows (not physically, but emotionally, we just weren't on the same page anymore), I was having a particularly hard time. I wanted to give up completely. I was feeling very lonely, I wanted to go home where I felt loved, and it didn't matter if I could play the piano or sing the high notes or any of that. I was stressed like I never had been before. I remember talking to Hubby on the phone (he was away at school in Wyoming at the time) and telling him how much I hated it. How much I didn't want to be there any more. How music education wasn't for me. And he suggested that I go into business. My dad worked(still does) in the business world and he's been very successful. I thought at that time that Daddy could just get me a job when I had a business degree.
I think maybe that's when I stopped making my own decisions. I thought Hubby sounded convincing enough, so I went with it. I decided to change my major to business that night and stuck with it for another five years. And now, I work at a job that has very little to do with the education that I received. And neither the job nor the education are even what I want to be doing. Don't get me wrong, I enjoy my job most of the time, and I don't plan on leaving any time soon. In fact, I'm working on furthering myself here.
But, if I could go back and relive that day, I'd probably still call the Hubs and my dad and bawl my eyes out. I'd ask them both what I should do and beg them to make the decision for me. But in the end, I'd think it over more. What is it that I want to do? How can I be successful, but still be happy about what I'm doing? What can I do that will challenge me and keep my interest? I think I would've found that if I'd pushed myself a little harder, I could have come up with so many more options. Maybe I would've ended up in the same place that I am now, but maybe not...
Monday, April 13, 2009
Care Package
Last week, there was a writing prompt at Twenty Something Writers called "Care Packages". I had planned to write something and then when I sat down to do it, I had a really difficult time coming up with people to send these care packages to, and an even more difficult time coming up with the contents of each package for those that I was able to come up with. So, I abandoned that idea and posted some randomness instead. But Mel had better luck than I did, in this post. And I was one of the recipients of her care packages. As soon as I read the advice that she had for me, I was in tears.
"3. Tell her everything you think but don't necessarily say. Sometimes we think they just know, but it's best to be sure!"
I was beyond choked up, and I attribute that to a couple things. I know that the advice comes from her heart. I know that if given the opportunity, she would have given herself the same advice a year ago. I think the other reason I was upset was that I know she's right. Just rereading her words, I get a lump in my throat. There are so many things that I don't tell my mom. I tell her that I love her every time I see her. Numerous times. She doesn't really talk anymore, just kind of observes everything that's going on around her. But when I tell her that I love her, she smiles and says it back.
That being said, there are a lot of things that I don't tell her. Not for any particular reason. I think it's mostly because I don't want to say anything that might upset her. I only see her for a few hours every two or three weeks, and I'd rather not spend any of that time on a heavy topic, like 'Mom, you are incredibly strong. I hope that I can be half as brave as you have been. I'm sorry that I was a punk ass teenager. I'm sorry that MS has taken so much from you. Thank you for pulling through so many times.' But Melissa is so right. I should tell her these things. She should know how proud I am of her. So, much like Mel's letters to her Gram, I decided to write my mom a letter. I don't know that I'm strong enough to read it to her myself, and I don't think she can see well enough to read it on her own, but maybe my dad can read it to her. That's kind of a cop out, huh? Well, I'll figure that part out later. Letter to Mom, coming soon. Can't do it at work...I'm already a semi-blubbering mess. This post is definitely better done at home.
"3. Tell her everything you think but don't necessarily say. Sometimes we think they just know, but it's best to be sure!"
I was beyond choked up, and I attribute that to a couple things. I know that the advice comes from her heart. I know that if given the opportunity, she would have given herself the same advice a year ago. I think the other reason I was upset was that I know she's right. Just rereading her words, I get a lump in my throat. There are so many things that I don't tell my mom. I tell her that I love her every time I see her. Numerous times. She doesn't really talk anymore, just kind of observes everything that's going on around her. But when I tell her that I love her, she smiles and says it back.
That being said, there are a lot of things that I don't tell her. Not for any particular reason. I think it's mostly because I don't want to say anything that might upset her. I only see her for a few hours every two or three weeks, and I'd rather not spend any of that time on a heavy topic, like 'Mom, you are incredibly strong. I hope that I can be half as brave as you have been. I'm sorry that I was a punk ass teenager. I'm sorry that MS has taken so much from you. Thank you for pulling through so many times.' But Melissa is so right. I should tell her these things. She should know how proud I am of her. So, much like Mel's letters to her Gram, I decided to write my mom a letter. I don't know that I'm strong enough to read it to her myself, and I don't think she can see well enough to read it on her own, but maybe my dad can read it to her. That's kind of a cop out, huh? Well, I'll figure that part out later. Letter to Mom, coming soon. Can't do it at work...I'm already a semi-blubbering mess. This post is definitely better done at home.
Friday, April 10, 2009
Positivity Pays Off...
So, in this post, I was bitching about how Hubby had gone back to third shift and I was really quite unhappy about it. And then, the next day, in this post, I decided rather than cry about it and expect the worst, I needed to just suck it up and make the most of the situation. And I have been. And things have actually been pretty okay. I thought once Hubby went back on third, he was going to become the cranky crabass that he used to be before the wonderful switch to 2nd. But he didn't. I tried to be quiet when I got home from work, and I let him get himself out of bed. He didn't need me to be his mother. If he's not up by 8:45, I harass him and tell him to get going. And for the ten minutes that we're in the same room, all is well. I even get an 'I love ya' sometimes. So, third shift turns out to NOT be the root of all evil in our relationship.
Meanwhile, he's been HATING being back on third. I think he forgot how much he disliked his boss (who really isn't a boss, but more like the guy who took over after the old boss left. He doesn't have a lot of authority. He's also foreign, and I don't think that he gets it that the guys walk all over him.). Hubby also was put on a new machine, doing something that he'd never really done before. It's still a cutter, but rather than cutting strips into labels, he was cutting massive sheets into strips. He needed time to learn the new job. But before he'd even start working for the day, the boss would be in his face, telling him 'You're going to cut 5 million tonight, right?' (I'm making up a number there, but the idea is that the number is bigger than what he used to do on the machine that he knew well.) Hubby automatically takes offense. Like the boss is riding him. They've had this argument many times before and it has always escalated to the point where they end up in the office, Hubby tells boss's boss that he's 'doing his job, get off my ass,' and boss's boss agrees with Hubby, telling boss to leave Hubby alone if he's working. Phew. That was a mouthful.
At any rate, after two weeks back on third, he was ready to do whatever he had to do to go back to second or even first shift, if it meant getting away from the boss. Boss's boss told him Sorry Man, you're stuck where you are. Just do what you do and ignore boss. So, two weeks ago, Hubby tells me, 'I have to adopt a new motto at work. It's no longer going to be about producing large numbers. Nope, now my motto is 'just cut'.' The idea being as long as he was doing something, it didn't matter what his output was and it didn't matter what boss was saying, he was doing what was required of him.
Side note: Hubby can be a stubborn pita. And he has major authority issues. In the 9 years we've been together, I've seen him get fired, laid off or quit at least 4 times, and all were related to the boss atm. I hope he realizes that my salary, even WITH his potential unemployment is NOT enough to pay the mortgage and all the bills. I think that's what 'just cut' was all about...At least I sure hope so.
So, that's what it's been. Third shift isn't the devil, from my perspective, but third shift boss and work has become the devil for Hubby. Poor guy.
Today, he announces to me that starting Monday, he's going back to second. (Hooray!!!) He says that the company is not doing so well in these financial times and that they're shutting down third shift completely. That's kinda scary, but he's still got a job and he's going back to second, so this is all good. I'm pretty happy and he seems to be, too. Oh! And third shift boss...He's getting demoted to a more physically strenuous, lesser paying, kinda crap job. Needless to say, Hubby's pretty stoked about that.
Meanwhile, he's been HATING being back on third. I think he forgot how much he disliked his boss (who really isn't a boss, but more like the guy who took over after the old boss left. He doesn't have a lot of authority. He's also foreign, and I don't think that he gets it that the guys walk all over him.). Hubby also was put on a new machine, doing something that he'd never really done before. It's still a cutter, but rather than cutting strips into labels, he was cutting massive sheets into strips. He needed time to learn the new job. But before he'd even start working for the day, the boss would be in his face, telling him 'You're going to cut 5 million tonight, right?' (I'm making up a number there, but the idea is that the number is bigger than what he used to do on the machine that he knew well.) Hubby automatically takes offense. Like the boss is riding him. They've had this argument many times before and it has always escalated to the point where they end up in the office, Hubby tells boss's boss that he's 'doing his job, get off my ass,' and boss's boss agrees with Hubby, telling boss to leave Hubby alone if he's working. Phew. That was a mouthful.
At any rate, after two weeks back on third, he was ready to do whatever he had to do to go back to second or even first shift, if it meant getting away from the boss. Boss's boss told him Sorry Man, you're stuck where you are. Just do what you do and ignore boss. So, two weeks ago, Hubby tells me, 'I have to adopt a new motto at work. It's no longer going to be about producing large numbers. Nope, now my motto is 'just cut'.' The idea being as long as he was doing something, it didn't matter what his output was and it didn't matter what boss was saying, he was doing what was required of him.
Side note: Hubby can be a stubborn pita. And he has major authority issues. In the 9 years we've been together, I've seen him get fired, laid off or quit at least 4 times, and all were related to the boss atm. I hope he realizes that my salary, even WITH his potential unemployment is NOT enough to pay the mortgage and all the bills. I think that's what 'just cut' was all about...At least I sure hope so.
So, that's what it's been. Third shift isn't the devil, from my perspective, but third shift boss and work has become the devil for Hubby. Poor guy.
Today, he announces to me that starting Monday, he's going back to second. (Hooray!!!) He says that the company is not doing so well in these financial times and that they're shutting down third shift completely. That's kinda scary, but he's still got a job and he's going back to second, so this is all good. I'm pretty happy and he seems to be, too. Oh! And third shift boss...He's getting demoted to a more physically strenuous, lesser paying, kinda crap job. Needless to say, Hubby's pretty stoked about that.
Chicken Breasts with Balsamic & Mushroom Sauce
Wow! I was super excited when I saw how many people commented on how yummy my food photos were for my You Capture this week!! I'm so glad that everyone thought it looked good enough to want the recipe. Especially since yesterday was a cooking disaster for me. I tried to make a new pork chop recipe from Betty crocker, and I totally burned it on the outside, while the chops were still pink on the inside. And then when I made the bacon for Hubby's blt sammies, I burned that, too. I have a tough time knowing what my heat level should be at. I tend to have it too hot, but I've been getting much better about it. With the exception of last night. I just couldn't get a handle on it!
So, anyway, here's my recipe! It could possibly be my favorite meal right now. Definitely in my top five. This recipe originates from All Recipes, but I've done a little doctoring, to suit my own tastes. While I'm on the topic, I'm a really big fan of All Recipes. They've got so many options and the site is really easy to navigate around. I also love the member reviews (which I suppose is kinda standard for recipe websites). I've found other cooks' suggestions to be very helpful, as I'm trying to develop my cooking skills. If you sign up for the daily recipe, they email you a recipe M-F. Sometimes, you get some really crazy things, but sometimes, you get some fabulous dishes, like this one here.
Chicken Breasts with Balsamic & Mushroom Sauce
2. Add the garlic. Turn the chicken breasts and scatter the mushrooms over them.
Cover tightly and simmer over medium low heat for 10 minutes, turning occasionally.
3. Transfer the chicken to a warm serving platter and cover with foil. Set aside. Continue simmering the sauce, uncovered, over medium high heat until the sauce thickens. (This photo does the thickness no justice.)
Swirl in the butter or margarine and discard the bay leaf. Pour this mushroom sauce mixture over the chicken and serve. I'm a huge fan of Wacky Mac's Veggie Curls right now, so that's what I usually pair this with.
So, anyway, here's my recipe! It could possibly be my favorite meal right now. Definitely in my top five. This recipe originates from All Recipes, but I've done a little doctoring, to suit my own tastes. While I'm on the topic, I'm a really big fan of All Recipes. They've got so many options and the site is really easy to navigate around. I also love the member reviews (which I suppose is kinda standard for recipe websites). I've found other cooks' suggestions to be very helpful, as I'm trying to develop my cooking skills. If you sign up for the daily recipe, they email you a recipe M-F. Sometimes, you get some really crazy things, but sometimes, you get some fabulous dishes, like this one here.
Chicken Breasts with Balsamic & Mushroom Sauce
INGREDIENTS 
3 skinless, boneless chicken breasts
salt and pepper to taste
8 ounces fresh mushrooms, sliced
2 tablespoons all-purpose flour
2 tablespoons olive oil
6 cloves garlic
1/2 cup balsamic vinegar
1 1/4 cups chicken broth
1 bay leaf
1/4 teaspoon dried thyme
1 tablespoon butter
DIRECTIONS
3 skinless, boneless chicken breastssalt and pepper to taste
8 ounces fresh mushrooms, sliced
2 tablespoons all-purpose flour
2 tablespoons olive oil
6 cloves garlic
1/2 cup balsamic vinegar
1 1/4 cups chicken broth
1 bay leaf
1/4 teaspoon dried thyme
1 tablespoon butter
DIRECTIONS
1. Season the chicken with salt and pepper. Rinse the mushrooms and pat dry. Season the flour with salt and pepper and dredge the chicken breasts in the flour mixture. Heat oil in a skillet over medium high heat and saute the chicken until it is nicely browned on one side (about 3 minutes).
2. Add the garlic. Turn the chicken breasts and scatter the mushrooms over them.
Continue frying, shaking the skillet and stirring the mushrooms. Cook for about 3 minutes, then add the vinegar, broth, bay leaf and thyme.
Cover tightly and simmer over medium low heat for 10 minutes, turning occasionally.
3. Transfer the chicken to a warm serving platter and cover with foil. Set aside. Continue simmering the sauce, uncovered, over medium high heat until the sauce thickens. (This photo does the thickness no justice.)
Swirl in the butter or margarine and discard the bay leaf. Pour this mushroom sauce mixture over the chicken and serve. I'm a huge fan of Wacky Mac's Veggie Curls right now, so that's what I usually pair this with.
And one of the best parts about this recipe! Only one dish (2 if you make pasta with it) to clean up!
Please let me know if you decide to make this recipe! I'd love to hear how it turns out for everyone else. I have to give a little warning about this one. The flavors are kinda...loud? Between the garlic and the balsamic vinegar, it's a very strong smelling and tasting dish. These are two of my favorite things, so I LOVE it. But I wouldn't be the least bit surprised if small children (and finicky husbands, like my own) stuck their noses up. That being said, one of my cats loved the little dish of leftovers that I shared with him! lol
Wednesday, April 8, 2009
You Capture - Fun
This week's You Capture Challenge was FUN! No...really...that's what the topic was. I mean, yes it was fun to do, but the topic itself was 'Fun'. So, I had these grandiose plans of going for a walk to the skate park around the corner, and taking photos of some of the kids doing their thang. But that never happened. I just didn't have the time or, frankly, the desire to walk over there. And what if I did and the kids were all 'Who are you, Lady? Why are you taking our pics?' No...I decided to drop that idea. So, instead, I tried to come up with some things that I find fun.
My first fun thing is cooking. And I've been doing a lot of it lately. Last night, I made one of my favorite!! dishes - Chicken Breasts with Balsamic & Mushroom Sauce (I'll be posting the recipe later tonight or tomorrow). Soooo...Here's my tasty photos!
Not a TON of ingredients, but OH SO TASTY!
Browning the chicken breasts...I really am finding that the more I cook, the better I get. Fancy that!
The sauce is just starting to get bubbly here...And by now, the whole house is smelling like garlic and balsamic vinegar. Great combo!
I'm really fond of this one. I think it looks pretty yummy and I really like how the colors are so bright.
My other fun topic is getting ready for work/going out/whatever. I love doing my makeup and my hair. I have TONS of eye shadows. I really like taking the time to make myself look nice in the morning.
I'm not such a huge fan of this makeup case photo...It just looks kinda sloppy. But I wanted to document just how many shadows I have...And there's so many more underneath the curling iron that are hiding beneath the nail polish bag.
Every chance I get, I wear turquoise, so I can wear this awesome shade of blue on my eyelids, too.
Every chance I get, I wear turquoise, so I can wear this awesome shade of blue on my eyelids, too. 
Chicken Saltimbaca
Chicken Saltimbaca was one of the first dishes that Hubby had at my parents' house, when we first started dating. It's also one of the few dishes that I can make from scratch and he'll actually enjoy. He's much more interested in things that come in a pouch, box or frozen bag. And if not that, then it must come through a drive-thru window. I have no idea how he got so fussy. His mom was just telling me this weekend that he's always been that way. I, on the other hand, am the complete opposite. I love to try new foods and new ways of preparing them. I like all different kinds of restaurants and if I wasn't so darn lazy sometimes, I'd never eat frozen/prepackaged stuff. The homemade version is always so much better. Anyway, that being said, on to my recipe! The measurements are not exact - I do this one from memory/by eye, so adjust as needed.
Chicken Saltimbaca
Ingredients:
3 boneless, skinless chicken breasts
3 slices (thinly sliced) ham or prosciutto
3 slices swiss cheese
1/2 cup tomato sauce
1/2 stick butter, melted
1 cup bread crumbs
1/2 cup grated parmesan cheese
1 tsp dried parsely
1/2 tsp garlic salt
Directions:
1. Heat oven to 350 degrees F. Place each chicken breast between two pieces of saran wrap, and pound breasts out to about 1/2-inch thickness. Remove top layer of saran wrap.
2. Mix bread crumbs, parmesan, parsely & garlic salt in a long, shallow bowl. Set aside.
3. Place 1 slice of ham on top of each chicken breast, one slice of swiss on top of that, and then drizzle some tomato sauce down the center (long ways). Try to keep the tomato sauce in one thin line, as you'll be rolling the chicken and you want to try to keep the sauce INSIDE. Now, roll each breast, making a spiral.
4. Dip each roll first in the melted butter, and then dip in bread crumb mixture, rolling the chicken, so that all sides are covered in breading.
5. Bake for 45-50 mins, until chicken is cooked through.
***I realized as I was typing this up that it would be so much...better...if I had photos to display. So, my next recipe post, which I plan on putting up tonight, will include some purdy pictures! :-)
Chicken Saltimbaca
Ingredients:
3 boneless, skinless chicken breasts
3 slices (thinly sliced) ham or prosciutto
3 slices swiss cheese
1/2 cup tomato sauce
1/2 stick butter, melted
1 cup bread crumbs
1/2 cup grated parmesan cheese
1 tsp dried parsely
1/2 tsp garlic salt
Directions:
1. Heat oven to 350 degrees F. Place each chicken breast between two pieces of saran wrap, and pound breasts out to about 1/2-inch thickness. Remove top layer of saran wrap.
2. Mix bread crumbs, parmesan, parsely & garlic salt in a long, shallow bowl. Set aside.
3. Place 1 slice of ham on top of each chicken breast, one slice of swiss on top of that, and then drizzle some tomato sauce down the center (long ways). Try to keep the tomato sauce in one thin line, as you'll be rolling the chicken and you want to try to keep the sauce INSIDE. Now, roll each breast, making a spiral.
4. Dip each roll first in the melted butter, and then dip in bread crumb mixture, rolling the chicken, so that all sides are covered in breading.
5. Bake for 45-50 mins, until chicken is cooked through.
***I realized as I was typing this up that it would be so much...better...if I had photos to display. So, my next recipe post, which I plan on putting up tonight, will include some purdy pictures! :-)
Crazy Dream, Pt 2
So, after posting about my crazy dream, I googled dream interpretation, and the first hit was Dream Moods. I did a little searching around this site, which has a very extensive dream dictionary, sorted by topic, alphabetically. I suppose it's all very subjective, but I thought some of it was very interesting.
1. Dreaming of the home your grew up in - signifies your desires for building a family of your own. SO VERY ON TOPIC!! It's the utmost thing on my mind lately. So, this does not surprise me in the least.
2. Patio (this was as close as I could find to sunroom) - this symbolizes your openness toward a particular situation. So, I'm thinking in combination with the first topic, this is again, right on track. So far, I'm understanding what my subconscious (did I spell that right...? It looks funny) is saying.
3. Falling & being fearful (I figure if the guy was plummeting to his death, he'd be fearful, but I, as the on-looker, was not really scared, just thought it was all strange...And also, I knew that the precariously perched pole was going to cause problems before anything even happened. I mean, who wouldn't!) - signifies a lack of control, insecurity and/or lack of support in your waking life. So...Would this mean that I'm fearful of not having control over the situation of the baby making? Because, I guess that makes sense. My biological clock is ticking so loudly that it's really all I can think of a lot of the time. And Hubby just isn't there with me. He wants babies, or so he says, but I don't think he's ready to give up being a child, himself. And he's certainly not willing to give up certain habits that, let's say, are inhibiting his swimmers.
4. Death - to see someone dying signifies your feelings for that person are dead or that a significant change/loss is occurring in your relationship with that person. This is where I'm having a tough time...I mean, I didn't know the guy. He was just some random worker guy that feel through the roof of my parents' house. So, it's not like I have a relationship with him. I don't know what to make of this part. Am I feeling like our opportunity to have a baby is "dying"? I do have a feeling like it's never going to happen, sometimes, though...?
5. Glasses - (I felt this was significant enough to remember - I oughta look it up.) Signifies a need for a clearer view of a situation; Misunderstanding which needs to be seen more clearly. I dunno if this was really all that important...I just found it odd that I noticed her glasses in the midst of this whole thing. Rose doesn't normally wear glasses, so this was weird, too. So, someone that's not in the middle of the whole thing seems to have a more clear view of the problem...?
Speaking of someone that's not in the middle of the whole baby-making thing who might have a clearer view...Hubby's mom gave me some lotion/perfume/shower gel for my bday that I find exceptionally offensive. It's called Pheromone something or other, which I thought was kinda strange coming from her. I didn't tell her that I didn't like it. I just don't do that. I thanked her and told her it was nice. Hubby said he kinda liked it, but I wasn't sure if he just said that because it came from his mom or what. So, I guess while she was at the house this weekend, she asked him if I'd been using the stuff. He told her that he didn't think I really liked it, but that he did. She said 'Yeah, that's the idea. I'm getting antsy about the whole grandbaby thing!' Soo...Maybe I should try the pheromones...? lol!!!
1. Dreaming of the home your grew up in - signifies your desires for building a family of your own. SO VERY ON TOPIC!! It's the utmost thing on my mind lately. So, this does not surprise me in the least.
2. Patio (this was as close as I could find to sunroom) - this symbolizes your openness toward a particular situation. So, I'm thinking in combination with the first topic, this is again, right on track. So far, I'm understanding what my subconscious (did I spell that right...? It looks funny) is saying.
3. Falling & being fearful (I figure if the guy was plummeting to his death, he'd be fearful, but I, as the on-looker, was not really scared, just thought it was all strange...And also, I knew that the precariously perched pole was going to cause problems before anything even happened. I mean, who wouldn't!) - signifies a lack of control, insecurity and/or lack of support in your waking life. So...Would this mean that I'm fearful of not having control over the situation of the baby making? Because, I guess that makes sense. My biological clock is ticking so loudly that it's really all I can think of a lot of the time. And Hubby just isn't there with me. He wants babies, or so he says, but I don't think he's ready to give up being a child, himself. And he's certainly not willing to give up certain habits that, let's say, are inhibiting his swimmers.
4. Death - to see someone dying signifies your feelings for that person are dead or that a significant change/loss is occurring in your relationship with that person. This is where I'm having a tough time...I mean, I didn't know the guy. He was just some random worker guy that feel through the roof of my parents' house. So, it's not like I have a relationship with him. I don't know what to make of this part. Am I feeling like our opportunity to have a baby is "dying"? I do have a feeling like it's never going to happen, sometimes, though...?
5. Glasses - (I felt this was significant enough to remember - I oughta look it up.) Signifies a need for a clearer view of a situation; Misunderstanding which needs to be seen more clearly. I dunno if this was really all that important...I just found it odd that I noticed her glasses in the midst of this whole thing. Rose doesn't normally wear glasses, so this was weird, too. So, someone that's not in the middle of the whole thing seems to have a more clear view of the problem...?
Speaking of someone that's not in the middle of the whole baby-making thing who might have a clearer view...Hubby's mom gave me some lotion/perfume/shower gel for my bday that I find exceptionally offensive. It's called Pheromone something or other, which I thought was kinda strange coming from her. I didn't tell her that I didn't like it. I just don't do that. I thanked her and told her it was nice. Hubby said he kinda liked it, but I wasn't sure if he just said that because it came from his mom or what. So, I guess while she was at the house this weekend, she asked him if I'd been using the stuff. He told her that he didn't think I really liked it, but that he did. She said 'Yeah, that's the idea. I'm getting antsy about the whole grandbaby thing!' Soo...Maybe I should try the pheromones...? lol!!!
What a crazy dream...
I woke up at 3:30 this morning after having a horrible dream. It wasn't really scary...I didn't wake up feeling panicked, but it was just crazy. And I didn't take any NyQuil last night, so I have no idea where this came from...
I was at my parents' house, out in the backyard, and I think I was having a picnic with someone...Not sure who, or why, but that's what we were doing. And there was a construction crew or maybe someone from a utility company or something...I can't remember the exact details, but there was a very tall pole of some sort precariously propped up against a very tall tree. And there was a worker up in the air, tethered to some kind of wire. Another worker caused the pole to fall, it caught on the wire that worker #1 was dangling from and snapped the wire. Worker #1 fell, through the roof of the sunroom, attached to the back of my parents' house, and died when he crashed to the ground.
I didn't actually LOOK at the guy, I just knew he was dead. I went inside the house (whoever I was picnicking with disappeared) and was all 'hey, uh...there's a dead guy in the sunroom.' Which, apparently everyone knew about. I know my grandparents were both there, as was Mom's CNA, Rose. Everyone was very calm about the whole thing, and the dead guy just continued to lay out there. None of the other workers were doing anything about him. And my family just kinda was milling around the kitchen. I remember thinking that I liked Rose's new glasses, but that it really wasn't a proper time to tell her that.
And then, I saw the guy move. Like he was having a seizure or an electric shock. I said something like, 'Hey! He's not dead! I just saw him move,' and Rose told me that no, he was dead, and it was just something that happened when people died in a traumatic way.
And then I woke up, saying to myself WTF was that??? I wonder what a dream interpretation would say about that...I wish we'd done that topic for science fair. We might not have gotten as far as we did with allelopathy, but it would have been far more interesting, and way less smelly. lol
I was at my parents' house, out in the backyard, and I think I was having a picnic with someone...Not sure who, or why, but that's what we were doing. And there was a construction crew or maybe someone from a utility company or something...I can't remember the exact details, but there was a very tall pole of some sort precariously propped up against a very tall tree. And there was a worker up in the air, tethered to some kind of wire. Another worker caused the pole to fall, it caught on the wire that worker #1 was dangling from and snapped the wire. Worker #1 fell, through the roof of the sunroom, attached to the back of my parents' house, and died when he crashed to the ground.
I didn't actually LOOK at the guy, I just knew he was dead. I went inside the house (whoever I was picnicking with disappeared) and was all 'hey, uh...there's a dead guy in the sunroom.' Which, apparently everyone knew about. I know my grandparents were both there, as was Mom's CNA, Rose. Everyone was very calm about the whole thing, and the dead guy just continued to lay out there. None of the other workers were doing anything about him. And my family just kinda was milling around the kitchen. I remember thinking that I liked Rose's new glasses, but that it really wasn't a proper time to tell her that.
And then, I saw the guy move. Like he was having a seizure or an electric shock. I said something like, 'Hey! He's not dead! I just saw him move,' and Rose told me that no, he was dead, and it was just something that happened when people died in a traumatic way.
And then I woke up, saying to myself WTF was that??? I wonder what a dream interpretation would say about that...I wish we'd done that topic for science fair. We might not have gotten as far as we did with allelopathy, but it would have been far more interesting, and way less smelly. lol
Monday, April 6, 2009
Weekend Update & Brilliant Idea
Happy Monday, Everyone. :-P I hope you all had a nice, relaxing weekend. Ours was very nice, though not the most relaxing ever. That's okay. I don't mind a little excitement.
I've been battling this stupid cold since St Patrick's Day - THANKS DAD! I started with a head cold - totally stuffy, head ache, phlegmy cough...Good times. That weekend, I was still a little congested, but I thought I was pretty much done with it. I had some minor coughing, but nothing that I couldn't handle. And then last week, like Thursday, it started to feel like I was getting worse again! Scratchy throat and dry coughing...I feel like I've got something stuck in my throat, but at the same time, I feel like it's dry as hell. When I try to talk after being quiet for a while, I sound horrible. So, the throat's kinda keeping me down, but whatever.
My mouth is mess, too! The fillings didn't really start to bother me until late last week. I can finally close my mouth all the way, and the foreign material is starting to feel more like tooth. But there's a spot on one of my teeth that's just not right. It feels very sharp when I slide my tongue over it. One more week and I'll be going back for the other side. Yay. :-( And then once I recover from all the fillings, I have to go in and have all four wisdom teeth pulled. I'm terrified.
On to the good stuff. My house is CLEAN! Like awesomely clean. My mother-in-law & my grandparents came up to visit on Saturday afternoon, so the house had to be spotless. These two women are the cleanest neat-freaks I know. My grandparents hadn't seen the house yet, and seemed quite impressed with it. Made me very proud. When my mom got sick, they moved down to be near us. They have been a very big part of my life and I am really scared for the day that they're no longer around.
They arrived around 1 and I immediately gave them the tour. After that, we talked about what we were going to do. I told them that I wanted to take them to the winery that we go to and then m-i-l and Omi decided that they wanted to see our grocery store. Side note about the grocery store - it's HUGE. And they've generally got great prices. Hubby and I have both raved about the store, so m-i-l & Omi, being deal chasers, were stoked to check it out. Woodman's (the grocery store) happens to be right across the street from the winery, so we were in luck. We had a little tasting at the winery, Omi & Opa got a couple cheeses & a bottle of Reisling. M-i-l and I tasted some Almond Champagne, which was really fabulous! And then Hubby and I picked out our free bottles, for our wine of the month club. We drove across the street and wandered around Woodman's for a half hour - not my favorite thing to do on Saturday at 3pm, but whatever floats your boat.
When we were done shopping, I suggested we head back to the house, so Omi could refrigerate her purchases (eggs, cheese, pork roast), but she insisted that it'd be okay in the trunk. Yikes! We went to our favorite Chinese place for lunch and had the whole restaurant to ourselves, which was very nice.
After lunch, they decided to head home. I kinda felt bad, as I think m-i-l would've liked to come back to the house and hang out for a while, but Omi & Opa were quite obviously pooped. After getting them back to the highway, we went home and I watched some tv while he played WoW. A very chill evening. Went to bed around 9, which was so nice!!
Sunday, I slept until 8:30 - yes, I slept almost 12 hours. I SO needed it. I didn't make it to mass, and felt sorta guilty about that. I was kinda bummed that I missed the palms, but isn't the Gospel on Palm Sunday like the longest ever? I gotta say, I'm not so bummed about missing that. I'll definitely be there this weekend. Maybe I'll try to drag Hubby. Probably not though. We didn't really do anything Sunday. Played the game for a while and then decided to go back to Woodman's so I could cook dinner for the Hubs. Which leads me to my next BRILLIANT IDEA!
I think I'm going to start posting recipes (perhaps even with pictures). I love to cook and I usually have no one to share it with, since Hubby is very picky about what he will and won't eat. I didn't take any photos last night, but I made a very tasty dinner - one of Hubby's favorites. I figure as long as I'm cooking, it wouldn't hurt to share some of the really good stuff with anyone that happens to be reading, right? Plus, I just recently took some time to delve into The Pioneer Woman. OMG...I thought I was going to die when I started looking at her site. She is everything that I wish I could be. A fabulous cook, photographer, baker, website pro, mother, wife of a cowboy (I mean, really, who doesn't want the Marlboro Man as her husband?), and GORGEOUS, to boot!!! Seriously, enough already! Spread some of the wealth! She's like Martha Stewart, but better. I figure the only way I'm going to get to that level of Susie Homemaker-ness, is if I give it a shot! So...That's my brilliant idea. Perhaps tonight, probably more like tomorrow, I will put up recipes for last night's dinner - Chicken Saltimbaca & Cheesy Au Gratin Potatoes. Woo Hoo!
Oh, PS, we got another 2 inches of snow yesterday. WTF is that all about!?!!??? Where's my effing spring at!?!!???
I've been battling this stupid cold since St Patrick's Day - THANKS DAD! I started with a head cold - totally stuffy, head ache, phlegmy cough...Good times. That weekend, I was still a little congested, but I thought I was pretty much done with it. I had some minor coughing, but nothing that I couldn't handle. And then last week, like Thursday, it started to feel like I was getting worse again! Scratchy throat and dry coughing...I feel like I've got something stuck in my throat, but at the same time, I feel like it's dry as hell. When I try to talk after being quiet for a while, I sound horrible. So, the throat's kinda keeping me down, but whatever.
My mouth is mess, too! The fillings didn't really start to bother me until late last week. I can finally close my mouth all the way, and the foreign material is starting to feel more like tooth. But there's a spot on one of my teeth that's just not right. It feels very sharp when I slide my tongue over it. One more week and I'll be going back for the other side. Yay. :-( And then once I recover from all the fillings, I have to go in and have all four wisdom teeth pulled. I'm terrified.
On to the good stuff. My house is CLEAN! Like awesomely clean. My mother-in-law & my grandparents came up to visit on Saturday afternoon, so the house had to be spotless. These two women are the cleanest neat-freaks I know. My grandparents hadn't seen the house yet, and seemed quite impressed with it. Made me very proud. When my mom got sick, they moved down to be near us. They have been a very big part of my life and I am really scared for the day that they're no longer around.
They arrived around 1 and I immediately gave them the tour. After that, we talked about what we were going to do. I told them that I wanted to take them to the winery that we go to and then m-i-l and Omi decided that they wanted to see our grocery store. Side note about the grocery store - it's HUGE. And they've generally got great prices. Hubby and I have both raved about the store, so m-i-l & Omi, being deal chasers, were stoked to check it out. Woodman's (the grocery store) happens to be right across the street from the winery, so we were in luck. We had a little tasting at the winery, Omi & Opa got a couple cheeses & a bottle of Reisling. M-i-l and I tasted some Almond Champagne, which was really fabulous! And then Hubby and I picked out our free bottles, for our wine of the month club. We drove across the street and wandered around Woodman's for a half hour - not my favorite thing to do on Saturday at 3pm, but whatever floats your boat.
When we were done shopping, I suggested we head back to the house, so Omi could refrigerate her purchases (eggs, cheese, pork roast), but she insisted that it'd be okay in the trunk. Yikes! We went to our favorite Chinese place for lunch and had the whole restaurant to ourselves, which was very nice.
After lunch, they decided to head home. I kinda felt bad, as I think m-i-l would've liked to come back to the house and hang out for a while, but Omi & Opa were quite obviously pooped. After getting them back to the highway, we went home and I watched some tv while he played WoW. A very chill evening. Went to bed around 9, which was so nice!!
Sunday, I slept until 8:30 - yes, I slept almost 12 hours. I SO needed it. I didn't make it to mass, and felt sorta guilty about that. I was kinda bummed that I missed the palms, but isn't the Gospel on Palm Sunday like the longest ever? I gotta say, I'm not so bummed about missing that. I'll definitely be there this weekend. Maybe I'll try to drag Hubby. Probably not though. We didn't really do anything Sunday. Played the game for a while and then decided to go back to Woodman's so I could cook dinner for the Hubs. Which leads me to my next BRILLIANT IDEA!
I think I'm going to start posting recipes (perhaps even with pictures). I love to cook and I usually have no one to share it with, since Hubby is very picky about what he will and won't eat. I didn't take any photos last night, but I made a very tasty dinner - one of Hubby's favorites. I figure as long as I'm cooking, it wouldn't hurt to share some of the really good stuff with anyone that happens to be reading, right? Plus, I just recently took some time to delve into The Pioneer Woman. OMG...I thought I was going to die when I started looking at her site. She is everything that I wish I could be. A fabulous cook, photographer, baker, website pro, mother, wife of a cowboy (I mean, really, who doesn't want the Marlboro Man as her husband?), and GORGEOUS, to boot!!! Seriously, enough already! Spread some of the wealth! She's like Martha Stewart, but better. I figure the only way I'm going to get to that level of Susie Homemaker-ness, is if I give it a shot! So...That's my brilliant idea. Perhaps tonight, probably more like tomorrow, I will put up recipes for last night's dinner - Chicken Saltimbaca & Cheesy Au Gratin Potatoes. Woo Hoo!
Oh, PS, we got another 2 inches of snow yesterday. WTF is that all about!?!!??? Where's my effing spring at!?!!???
Thursday, April 2, 2009
"You develop a 're-pore'..."
REPORE!?!!??? Geez, Guy!
I'm watching 'Extreme Makeover: Home Edition' on ABC.com, and on the latest episode, they were building a home for a family that took in a WHOLE LOT of wild animals. They had something like 50 big cats (tigers, leopards, lynxes) that other people had assumingly purchased on the black market and then given up when the animals got to be too much. The family's house was in serious need of some help and EMHE came to the rescue. It was a great story, I cried when I was supposed to and laughed when Ty and the designers were goofy and ridiculous. And in the middle of it all, one of the volunteers was talking about how each of the animals are different and have their own personalities and how you develop a 'repore' with each one...I wanted to strangle him through the screen. Dude, if you're going to be on national tv, try not to look like a doofus. I understand that the word 'rapport' is not spelled how it sounds and a lot of people may think that repore is the correct spelling of the word. But to accentuate the E (Re-pore), you just sound dumb.
There are a lot of stupid things like this that bug me. And I thought I'd share. :-)
I'm watching 'Extreme Makeover: Home Edition' on ABC.com, and on the latest episode, they were building a home for a family that took in a WHOLE LOT of wild animals. They had something like 50 big cats (tigers, leopards, lynxes) that other people had assumingly purchased on the black market and then given up when the animals got to be too much. The family's house was in serious need of some help and EMHE came to the rescue. It was a great story, I cried when I was supposed to and laughed when Ty and the designers were goofy and ridiculous. And in the middle of it all, one of the volunteers was talking about how each of the animals are different and have their own personalities and how you develop a 'repore' with each one...I wanted to strangle him through the screen. Dude, if you're going to be on national tv, try not to look like a doofus. I understand that the word 'rapport' is not spelled how it sounds and a lot of people may think that repore is the correct spelling of the word. But to accentuate the E (Re-pore), you just sound dumb.
There are a lot of stupid things like this that bug me. And I thought I'd share. :-)
You Capture - Signs of Spring!
I finally did it! I managed to get my stuff together and take some photos for this week's You Capture over at I Should Be Folding Laundry (which, btw is one of my FAVORITE blogs of all time!!!!)
This week's challenge was Spring. Pfft! If you remember from this post, Mother Nature dumped a bunch of snow on us this weekend. So, my signs of spring, really look a lot like winter. :-/
I think this first one is my favorite...The little bumps are actually buds on the bush - a sign that spring is TRYING to come to life, covered by the snow. Gives it a really cool looking texture, I think!
This one comes in a close second. It's the bush in my front yard. I just love how everything looks so magical when the snow sticks to it.
This week's challenge was Spring. Pfft! If you remember from this post, Mother Nature dumped a bunch of snow on us this weekend. So, my signs of spring, really look a lot like winter. :-/
I think this first one is my favorite...The little bumps are actually buds on the bush - a sign that spring is TRYING to come to life, covered by the snow. Gives it a really cool looking texture, I think!
This one comes in a close second. It's the bush in my front yard. I just love how everything looks so magical when the snow sticks to it.
I had more, but these two were the best of the bunch.
So much to say...
I have a ton of things that I want to blog about today...I'm going to have to be crafty in how I do it though. I can't be spending the whole day blogging! I'm supposed to be working! Just a mental list of things to cover:
1. ER ;-(
2. You Capture!
3. "re-pore"
4. Newest brilliant idea - recipes!
1. ER ;-(
3. "re-pore"
4. Newest brilliant idea - recipes!
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