Thirty Days - Day Ten

A photo of me taken over ten years ago

I couldn't pick just one...I love embarrassing myself with old pics.  Especially when other people are included in them.  :-)

First, a picture from 1996, so that puts me us in 8th grade.  I'm on the left with my big bushy eye brows and sticker on my cheek.  And on the right is Melissa, giving me the evil eye.  You love me.  I promise.  Not sure what the dirty look was for that day.  Geez, we look like such babies!

This picture was taken in the basement of the Catholic grade school I went to for 7th & 8th grade.  The basement was used for many different functions - lunch room during the week, meeting space for after masses, a place to pick up your market day orders, and the place where we had our weekly music classes (Side note - to this day, when I hear "La Cucaracha", I still remember the two of us convincing Mrs. K that we should sing it in class...Despite the fact that NONE of us spoke Spanish!  lol!!).

This second picture is from Prom, my senior year.  What a difference four years can make on some eyebrows, right???  lol  I went from one ridiculous extreme to the other.  I'm glad to say, they've settled at a more normal place and size nowadays.  :-)

About a month before prom, my boyfriend of two years and I called it quits.  I didn't know what I was going to do about prom.  It was the first dance in years that I actually had to worry about finding a date for.  The guy that I went with, Tim, was a good friend and such a nice guy.  He asked me before I could make the mistake of going with my ex "for old times' sake".  I'm fairly certain that Tim would have liked to become an item, but I was too busy feeling sorry for myself to realize what a wonderful boyfriend Tim would've made.  I haven't had much contact with him since I graduated, but I'm sure that he's continued being a nice guy and is making his wifey a happy girl. 

30 Days - Day 4

A Favorite Book

I've been slacking for a couple days.  I was busy at work and tired at night, so I missed a couple days.  I'm sure you're over it.

I don't know if I actually have a favorite book.  There've been a lot of books that I've read that I liked.  A lot.  But I can't say there's one particular book that I would call my favorite.  If you sit me in a quiet room with a Nicholas Sparks book, I'll have it finished before you know it.  But none of them have been like ohmygod, I could read this book a bazillion times and never get bored with it.

For a long time, when asked my favorite book, I would respond with 'Summer Sisters' by Judy Blume.  But to be perfectly honest, I hardly even remember it anymore.  Perhaps I should go back and re-read it and remind myself why I liked it so much.

I just recently pulled all of my books out of a box and put them on display.  And there are SO many that I know I read, but can't remember most of the story.  And then there are a bunch more that I don't know that I ever finished.  And mixed in with all of those, there's a handful of books that I remember reading and I remember the whole thing.  Maybe I should classify those as my favorites...

Wow.  This was a much longer post than I thought it would be.  Gotta love rambling.  Hope you all have a fantastical weekend!

B-Wagon

Oh hell.

I got wrapped up in life and forgot to update my blog.  I apologize.  As I will again next time this happens. 

But for now, Melissa has inspired me to come back.  So, let's do the quick recap of what's happened in my life...

November:

• Terrie had a birthday.  We celebrated with friends.  Good times were had.
• Hubby & I did Thanksgiving solo - I made a turkey & fixings and then we went to see a movie.
• My coworker JB informed us that she had been accepted into the LPN program at the local community college and at the beginning of year, she would need to either become part time or leave the company.  Part-time was not available to her, so she helped in the interviewing and hiring process for her replacement.

December

• I received a Christmas card and $200 cash from an 'Anonymous Friend' in the mail.  Over the last few months, I sorta accidentally found out that it was from a coworker.  I sent a thank you card back to the return address (which had no name and was in California), and have let that person remain anonymous.
• I asked for a raise in lieu of the new responsibilities and additional workload that I'd be taking on with JB leaving.  I was denied.  But managers said that they would continue to push Bossman Bob to compensate me for the work I'd be doing.
• Holidays were lovely - had Christmas Day at our house for my mother-in-law & her boyfriend.
• Sang in the Christmas Eve mass with the choir - super long HOT mass, but very nice.
• Joined a...club?  A friend from choir invited me to join a group that she's in that consists of women that live in the area.  They do monthly events, which I've tried to attend at least one of per month.  December was my first time playing Bunco.  LOVED IT!

January

• I turned 29.  Holy hell.  How did that happen??
• JB's replacement was hired and started.  She's older (in her late 40's probably?), but very nice and is getting the hang of things.  I don't see us becoming good friends and going to lunch and getting our makeup done together, but I know we'll be able to work well together.
• JB left for good.  I cried as I walked down to my car that day.  I hate goodbyes.
• I planned a Baby Shower for Terrie with a Gone Fishing theme.  The invitations were handmade and amazing, if I do say so myself.  I had all type of fishy themed things planned, including fish bowl centerpieces with live goldfish on the two main tables.
• My managers continued pushing Bob for my raise and he finally gave in.  Yay!

February

• Terrie's shower was a success!  Everyone enjoyed themselves and I received a ton of compliments on what a nice job I'd done.  If only I could plan parties for a living.  That would really, truly be a dream come true.
• I have a new pet fish.  :-)  One of the two centerpiece fish went home with a guest from the party as a door prize.  The other one was abandoned.  No, really, the other guest who won the second fish had no interest in taking it home.  And I have to admit that I was kinda happy about that.  I wouldn't have minded keeping both of them. 
• You can't have just one fish in a ten-gallon tank, so we got two more.  They all seem to be coexisting happily together.  Freddie, Mortimer & Albert are all different types of goldfish and totally fascinating to me.  I can literally sit in front of the aquarium for over an hour and just watch them swim around.  Ridiculous, I know.

And I think that's about it.  You'll notice there are no updates on Hubby - he's still not working.  And there's still not a chance of a baby in the near future.  One is very dependent on the other, so I just continue to wait....:-P  Life is actually pretty good right now.  I mean, aside from the lack of a job on Hubby's part, things are plugging along.  The new responsibility at work is welcome.  I like having stuff to do for the entire day.  I like being the more experienced one.  I like feeling like a big fish in a small pond.  Always have.

Anyway, that's life for now.  Melissa is doing a fantabulous challenge, which I will be happy to steal and start doing tomorrow.  :-)  I hope that I'm able to get back into the swing of things.  I'm just going to have to figure out how to blog and watch tv at the same time. 

Lost in YouTube...

So, I'm relatively new to the whole YouTube phenomenon. I mean, I've known what it was and occasionally, I would go there if I was looking for something in particular. But I've been spending more time lately just clicking around. There's some really stupid shit. And some really bad stuff. And then there's some really good stuff.

Today, I somehow got the idea to look for karaoke songs. Which led to two hours of me singing one random song after another. Good times. I then started looking up some oldies, but goodies. Fabulous Thunderbirds, Tom Petty and then this gem. I absolutely adore this song. Easily one of my top 10 favorite songs of all time.



It literally brings me to tears everytime. Even if I listen to it two or three times in a row. The one real memory that I have of this song, a guy named Brian requested it at one of our high school dances for his girlfriend, Jenny. Not me and my ex Bryan, but I imagined that it was, as we danced together. That couple isn't together anymore, either. But just the sentiment behind the song does it to me. It's like a fairy tale. And it makes me wonder if there really are men out there that feel this strongly about the women that they love. *sigh*

In other news, the reason that I was able to sing along with my newfounnd karaoke songs in my kitchen tonight is that Hubby is working this week. And he worked last week, too. I'm super excited about that. And what excellent timing. One of my coworkers is getting married down in Peoria this weekend (about a three hour drive from our house), so we're getting a hotel room and getting sloshed. Should be good times getting drunky with some of my current and past coworkers. I found out today that the groom-to-be was kind enough to not seat me and O.B. at the same table. He'll be at the other table of current and former coworkers. I'm also going to get my HURR DID on Wednesday. I'm getting the same color that I've been getting for a while (a dark brown all over and super dark purplish lowlights). But I'm getting a "gloss" on top of that. Which is supposed to make it super duper shiny for a longer time. And she's got some coupon code that's gonna make the gloss free! Woot! Love FREE!

I'm very excited about getting out of the house with Hubby for the weekend. And I'm excited about getting to dress up. And spend some time with my coworkers outside of work. I wish JB was coming, but her little one will only be a month old on Friday, so she's decided to stay home. Probably a good call. :-) Anyway...That's all for now. Hubby will be home shortly and I really should be getting bed. I hope everyone is doing well!

Holler!!

Wow! The blogs that I enjoy reading so very much are sadly barren...Must be how you all have felt since I disappeared. ;-) I hope that you all are super busy and so full of wonderfulness in your lives, that you just haven't had the time to post. In contrast to my inability to come up with anything interesting to talk about!!!

I had a little blurb about Hubby still not working right here. I decided to remove it because it's just repetition and I really dislike being redundant. So, we'll just move on to other people, who have far more interesting things to talk about.

Hubby's cousin, who I took wedding photos for last September, and his wife are filing for divorce. Yes, you read that correctly. They were married on Sept 19th, 2009 and were already in the process of getting a divorce by Sept 19th, 2010. It's definitely a sad situation, but not totally surprising. They're a volatile couple and have been on again, off again for something like six years now. They rescheduled and called off their wedding at least two times. It was actually mildly surprising that they went through with the marriage. When they first started dating, I didn't like her much, but that was more due to the fact that she was pretty and seemed to have her shit together than anything else. Over the years, she and I got to know one another and she grew on me. It seemed that she wanted to have a friendship with me and was very nice to feel like I had someone to talk with at family get-togethers. But he has moved back in with his mom and next weekend, will be formally moving out - going to her house and packing up all his shit and moving it back to his mom's.

Hubby and I were talking about the whole situation this weekend. They're both from divorced families. Hubby & I are both from non-divorced families. He wondered if children who grew up in divorced homes are more likely to divorce than those who did not. I'm sure there's research that supports both ideas. I don't know all the details of why they've decided to split. Hubby said that she didn't want the divorce, that it's his cousin who's doing it. Apparently, she's very jealous and thinks that any girl he talks to, he's cheating with. She also has a bad habit of spending all of his money. He was laid off for a number of months and they racked up a bunch of debt. Once he started working again, and making a very good wage, she just went nuts and rather than paying off the debt, continued to spend, spend, spend.

Hubby told his cousin that if he needs a day or two away from his mom, he's welcome to crash at our house. I guess Cousin said 'I don't know how long I'm going to stay at my mom's, but yeah. I might take you up on that. Especially if you're still laid off, I could throw you some rent money.' Essentially suggesting that he stay with us a for a while. Hubby real quick put the kabash on that, but I would totally be down!!! If we could get some extra income, it would certainly help our financial situation. Plus, it might be nice to have another guy around to do the manwork. lol I hate having to take out the trash and bring the grill in & out of the garage. Plus, he's nice to look at. lol That would never happen, though. Hubby appreciates his privacy far too much to invite someone to live with us for an unknown amount of time. Even if it meant a couple hundred extra dollars a month....:-P

I'm having a hard time determining what I want to be for Halloween this year. I usually have a teammate at work in my dressing up, but since she's on maternity leave with her newborn, I'm probably going to be solo dressing up at work. Another coworker dressed up last year. But he's getting married two weeks before Halloween, and will only return from his honeymoon a couple days before the holiday. So, I'm kinda thinking of something a little less involved, but I love using Halloween as an excuse to do some dramatic makeup. Anyone have any ideas? Something cheap, but that would require some kind of fancy/interesting/cool makeup? I've done a cat, a dark fairy, Dorothy (from Wizard of Oz), and a witch in the years since I've been at my job. I was thinking of doing the fae again, but like I said earlier, I hate to repeat myself.

I think I'm going to get back to work now. I hope everyone is doing well. And I hope to see some new posts by all you lovelies, soon!! :-)

One month is better than two

Hello Friends!

Yes, I've let another month slip by without updating my lil ol' blog. I spent some time spiffing it up today. You like that, don't you??? :-)

I promise to try to be a bit more positive today than I was last time I posted. For the most part, things haven't really changed.

Hubby is still not working. He has been laid off for over four months now. We got a major wake up call a couple weeks ago, when we got a letter from the bank, stating that our mortgage was about to go up by about 30%. Long story short, our escrow was short when they paid our taxes this year because our taxes went up an enormous amount, so we're making up for that, plus putting in extra so it doesn't happen again next year. Unfortunately for us, we don't have an extra 30% of our mortgage just laying around. We've cut costs about as much as we possibly can. The next step will be to shut off our phones, which I'm really hoping we don't have to do. My dad has been very generous and has offered to give us a monthly loan, as needed. Which is great, but for God's sake. I'm almost 30. I'd love to get to the point where I don't have to ask my dad for money all the time!

The good part of this realization, though, is that Hubby has started applying for jobs and has even gone on a couple interviews. His last one was this past Monday. The job seemed to be a good fit for him and he thought that it went very well. The HR guy that he interviewed with said that he would schedule an interview for Hubs to talk with the floor manager and that he'd be in touch. We still haven't heard anything, though. Hubby tried calling to talk to the HR guy on Wednesday, but he wasn't in. So, that's about where it all stands. No further communication. I think it's going to be time to start doing some more applications this weekend.

Still no baby. No real progress on that. Perhaps now is not the time to really be pushing that, since we can barely afford to support ourselves, let alone bring a baby into the situation.

Things have been crazy at work lately. My friend JB just had her baby this week. A beautiful little girl. So this means that everything that she and I usually do together, will be all my responsibility. I'm tempted to ask for a raise, but due to other circumstances, I'm very hesitant. About a week ago, one of our main programmers - the guy that knows everything and does everything and is the go-to guy for EVERYTHING - let us know that he has decided to take a position with another company. This will be an incredibly BIG hit to our team. Everyone has been trying to convince the poor guy that he should stay. They've gotten the big-bossman on board and have offered this employee everything that he said were reasons for wanting to leave, but he seems to have made his mind up. He's been with the company for 15 years and I think it's just gotten to be too much. While he is that go-to guy, with that comes a lot of work. He works harder and longer than anyone else in the office. He takes on more tasks and is constantly being pulled in 7 different directions. I can completely understand. I think there's probably a lot of pressure coming from his wife at home, as well. So, this programmer has one more week with us.

In all of the craziness of trying to convince him to stay, the team decided to let another programmer go. This guy is new to our team, been with us for only a few months. But he's been very slow to catch on and just hasn't seemed to really fit with the rest of the team. I think a large part of that is a language barrier. He's Chinese and on more than one occasion, I saw him translating things online from English to Chinese and vice versa. I don't think anyone else really knew that because after he'd left and they were starting to prep his laptop for someone else to use, they found that just about everything on the computer (all of the programs, etc) were in Chinese.

Finally, to make up for the new guy and the go-to guy leaving, they've brought back an ex-employee who left five years ago to be home with her two sons. Both of her boys are in school now, so it seems that it was the perfect opportunity for her to come back to work. It's nice that she has some knowledge of our software and that she isn't brand new, but five years is a lot of time to catch up on. There have been countless changes to the software that she will have to learn about. She's been back to the office a few times since I've been with the company and every time, she introduces herself to me as if we've never met. And then proceeds to ignore me while she chats it up with all her old pals. She started working on Thursday and after she shook my hand again, telling me her name, I was half expecting her to do it again on Friday. But no, she finally remembered me.

I don't really have any feelings either way about her. Over the years, as she ignored my presence, I was a little peeved that she couldn't just include me in conversation or ask about me. But whatever, she was there to see her old coworkers, and I was not one of them. So that's cool. She's kept to herself over the last few days. Just asking questions when need be. The thing that I am most unhappy about with her coming back is that the office boss (OB) decided to give up his desk so that she could be in a more central location in the room. Unfortunately for me, that means that OB has taken up residence beside me. I feel as though he's looking over my shoulder all the time. He is a major micro-manager and I was annoyed by him when he was on the other side of the room. Now, he is in my space. So, because I need to get all of my issues with him out of the way, here is a list of all of the reasons why OB irritates me:
1. He's loud. As in using his outdoor voice when he should be using his indoor voice.
2. He has a tendency to smell. When it gets warm in the office, he has a distinct odor of cat urine. Even though he doesn't have any cats.
3. He is messy. Not just clutter mess, but dirty mess. His keyboard and mouse look like they need to be disinfected. And the mess isn't just on his desk. It spreads. The credenza that is behind us, where I used to keep a blanket and my laptop bag, has been taken over. As he moved all his shit over on Wednesday afternoon, he jokingly said to me 'We're going to have to fight it out for credenza space.' Fight it out my ass! He picked up my things and moved them to a bookshelf on the other side of my desk, blocking the white board where we write pertinent information. Which he never looks at. Obviously. So, I picked my shit up and stuffed it inside the credenza with some of my other belongings. Hopefully, he doesn't feel the need to put shit inside there, too.
4. He is snarky. He gets this chip on his shoulder sometimes and I just want to throw a fucking stapler at him. I suppose I've got a much better chance of hitting him now.
5. He talks to himself. When he's not yelling across the room or into the phone, and he's actually trying to do some work, he mumbles to himself. Just loud enough to disrupt me.
6. He walks heavily...We're on the 8th floor, so when people walk around, the floor sorta wobbles a little. But when OB walks around, I swear the floor is going to cave in. And he's constantly meandering around. He can never seem to just sit still. Dude, either go over there and do whatever it is that you think you need to do or sit the fuck down. You are distracting me!
7. He butts into conversations on the regular. I can't wait for JB to come back and she and I will be having a chit chat and he's gotta put his two cents in. I feel like saying to him 'Hey! We're not talking to you. Butt the fuck out!' I also feel like I'm going to have to take personal calls out in the hallway now. Before, if Hubby would call to just say hey or something, I didn't have a problem taking the call at my desk. But I feel like if I talk on the phone with OB next to me, he's going to be listening.

I'm quite positive that there are other reasons that having OB as my neighbor is going to suck. But for now, this is what I've got.

Anyway, work is going to be very interesting as all of these changes play out.

All my fall shows are starting. As of right now, I have 45 shows that I'll be at the very least watching the first couple episodes of. Some of these 45 are at the end of the season, most are just about to begin. I just finished watching the first season of Persons Unknown. I was immediately sucked in! I think I downloaded the first episode on Tuesday or Wednesday and I've watched the whole season already. Granted, it was only 13 episodes, but I really enjoyed it. I definitely hope that they're planning on bringing it back for another season.

I think that's all I have for today.

A little of this and a little of that

It wasn't a fluke!

We had another really nice weekend! I made French toast for breakfast on Saturday, we watched some tv together and did some yardwork together. Hubby came down to the kitchen and ate dinner with me. Sunday, after church, we grilled burgers & brats for lunch, relaxed together for the afternoon and then I went to dinner with some of my favorite girls.

I'm looking forward to the weekend again, not just because I won't be working, but because I'll be able to spend time with Hubby! What a complete 180!!! And he seems to be pretty content, as well. I feel like he's a different person. I don't know if it was that he heard my unhappiness and finally felt like it was time to do something about it. Or perhaps it's directly related to the lack of green. I don't know what exactly to attribute the change to, but I'm really encouraged. Two weeks in a row and things are still good. We're both putting forth an effort to make one another happy. And it's really nice!!!

Yesterday was Opa's 88th birthday. At the last minute, I decided to take off of work a couple hours early and visit the cemetary with Omi. She didn't want to stay for very long. I can understand that, but I would have liked to stay longer. Now I know where he is, though, so I can go see him on my own and stay longer if I choose. Omi and I are both very emotional people, so once one of us starts getting choked up, the other is sure to follow. Definitely, next time I'm down there, I'll go see him and have a little chat on my own.

I contacted JB's tattoo artist about the piece that I want to get. It's not going to be cheap. He said it'll probably take more than one session and each session is $250 (3-4 hours, depending on how much I can take) or $100/hour. So, it could be anywhere from $350-500. But he sounded really stoked about the idea. I told him that I'll have to book the appointment a couple months out, so that I can save up the money. I'm hoping by late June, I can do the first session. Hubby isn't totally thrilled about the idea - he'd like to see me spend the money elsewhere - but he has said that he isn't going to tell me I can't do it. He's probably right. It would be more responsible to spend the money on something more practical, like a storm door for our front door or make a larger dent in our credit card debt. But it's important to me to do this in memory of Opa. I don't want to wait forever for it, ya know? I've set aside $50, so I'm that much closer!

I have my first choir practice tomorrow! The director called me last week and invited me to come to rehearsal. I did go up and introduce myself to him this Sunday. He seems very nice. I can't wait to start singing in a choir again. I'm so super excited about it!!! Last week, I went to the youth ministry adult planning meeting. They do so many different activities and events for the teens in the parish. I'm really excited to get involved with them, as well.

I can't believe how quickly the summer starts filling up with plans! I'm planning a camping trip in June with some of my girlfriends, Hubby & I are going to take a vacation in July (He even suggested getting on a PLANE to go somewhere...This is HUGE!!!!), some of the girls & I are planning a "hookie" day in August, September is my 10 year high school reunion (holy crap!), October is a coworker's wedding and November is a sorority sister's wedding. Today is only April 14th! I can only imagine how many other things are going to fill up this summer. I'm SO excited!

Two Nights in a Row?

Sometimes I like to share my dreams with you...Once upon a time, Melissa and I were going to dream interpretations as a science fair project. We were convinced by our teacher that it wasn't the best idea, so we never did it, but I've always been fascinated by dreams and what they mean, if anything.

Occasionally, I'll have a dream of a hunky guy wanting to love me. Or of a bad guy trying to break into my home. The other night, I dreamt I was on a school bus, on a super busy road and there was an accident up ahead. The driver didn't react quickly enough, and he lost control of the bus. He warned us to brace ourselves and in the dream, I immediately started saying the 'Our Father.' I said it loudly to drown out the sounds of panic around me and as I was saying the prayer, it was almost like I was in some Heavenly state...I think I thought that I was dying in the dream. Anyway, I woke up in a panic. It seems that whenever I have a "bad dream," I startle myself awake. And then I'm immediately freaked out that it was something in real life that startled me. My immeditae fear is that someone's in the house. So, I lay there silently, not moving. Waiting to see if I hear something again. If the cats are nearby, I'll look to them to gauge myself. If they're not freaked out, I can generally assume that things are okay.

Anyway, after having the bus dream, I went back to sleep and had another dream that started out quite pleasant. I was at a mall or something, and I'm hanging out with Sawyer from Lost.

Let me just go on a bit of a tangent here... he is the most gorgeous man alive...Those dimples and the body and the voice...holy hell...He is my picture of excellence. Rough and tough on the outside, southern accent, comedic value. And then on the inside, total heart of gold. He's a little damaged, but who the hell cares? I want to love him. And I'm so super sad that after this season of Lost, my dear beautiful Sawyer will cease to exist. Josh Holloway, you better find an equally wonderful, regular role on a show where I can adore you some more. /tangent

So, me and Sawyer, we're chillin at the book store or something. And he turns to me and looks into my eyes and asks me if I'll go out for ice cream with him. Um, hello? You're Sawyer! Of course, I will. We set up a date and I go home to deal with everyday life with Hubby. And then some "friend" of mine calls me from the bookstore - she's there with Sawyer now - and she tells me that I shouldn't go on this date. How could I cheat on my husband? This isn't right. She's begging me not to go. In response, I tell her to go pound sand. This is the man of my dreams. I am NOT turning him down, no matter what!! Then, while she still has me on the phone, she turns to Sawyer and says 'I'll pay you $xx not to do this.' I'm furious with her! And while this is all going on over the phone, as I put a dish in the sink, I notice something leaking from the ceiling. I look up, just in time to watch like a bucket full of liquid bust through the ceiling into the kitchen. I'm no longer on the phone, and now I'm shouting up to Hubby to bring his ass downstairs and, as usual, he tells me 'I'm playing the game right now. I can't come down there at this minute.' And then I wake up.

So...Basically, Mr. Hotness wants me. There's some guilt about screwing around on Hubby. And then the house gets damaged.

I had another dream tonight that followed a very similar pattern, but wasn't quite the same.

Sawyer was at my house this time. Doing things to me & with me that I will not go into detail about. A girl has to keep some things to herself. ;-) Anyway, we have ourselves a nice time and then his personality transforms...He's no longer the southern charmer that I've grown to love, but he becomes Hubby in Sawyer's body. Essentially, he becomes a bit of an asshole. I roll my eyes and go into the bathroom to pee, and find that a hole has been punched through the bathroom wall and another hole in the bathroom floor. I ask him what happened and he gives me some bullshit excuse, like he can't be bothered with it.

What the hell does this mean???

I dunno, I'll take the damages to my house if I can get some serious loving from Sawyer. Sometimes, you have to compromise, ya know? :-)

I'm at about 50%...

I always end up all over the place in these posts...I have so much to say, and just want to tell you everything! Perhaps if I posted more than once every two weeks, I wouldn't feel the need to jam it all into one post. Oh well. I do. Get over it. :-)

In one of my more recent posts, I discussed resolutions. I've been doing quite well with the church one. I've gone to mass every weekend since the beginning of the year. Granted, that's only three weeks, but it's 2 more weeks than the last time I thought I was ready to go back. And frankly, I don't see myself slacking on this one. I feel really good about it. That first Sunday, I went back to St. Charles Borromeo (SCB), the church that sort of reminds me of my old "home." It's about the same size and probably about the same age. They've got a choir (which is very important to me - I NEED to get back singing) and it's the closest. But I wanted to check out some of the other churches in the area, to make sure that I find the one that is right for me.

So, for the last two weeks, I attended mass at St. Mary's. I don't think I've ever seen a Catholic church this big. When I pulled into the parking lot, I literally out-loud, to myself, exclaimed 'Holy Crap!' It looked enormous to me. Inside is beautiful. Very, very large. It was built in 2001, so it has these modern-ish features. I don't know if I'd ever be comfortable in a parish that is so enormous. I've always enjoyed being a part of small things - small church, small(ish) high school, small colleges, small company. It does seem like St. Mary's has a lot to offer, including a choir (and a youth group that is looking for adult volunteers!). But I have to admit, I feel a bit overwhelmed there. And to be perfectly honest, the pews are really uncomfortable. lol They're low to the ground, and I find it near impossible to kneel on the kneelers. Maybe a silly con, but a con still.

This coming weekend and the week after, I'm planning on going to St. Catherine's, which a bit further (maybe 15 or 20 minutes from home), but I've heard a lot of good things about it. My aunt/uncle/cousins live in the area, so I asked for some suggestions. My aunt and cousin highly suggested this one, saying that they have a nice choir, youth programs, and while it's not a small church by any stretch, it's not as gigantic as St. Mary's. One of my coworkers told me that this is the church that she grew up going to and says that she likes it much more than SCB, where she had her children baptized. I'm really excited to go to mass at St. Catherine's on Sunday. I'm hoping that this one will be the perfect fit for me.

My second resolution - keeping better track of my sugar levels - is going okay. I'm testing at least once a day (supposed to do twice a day). I'm often surprised to see how high it is. Especially in the morning. I guess knowing is part of the battle, though. If I know it's high, I can be better prepared to combat it.

My final resolution - the same one that I have had every year since I was probably 9 - is stagnant. I just don't have motivation. I'm not hashing this out again. I'm just sayin...1.5 out of 3 isn't too bad, right? :-/

In other news, my birthday was a week ago today. It was really a fantabulous birthday! Seriously, best birthday in years. I must have gotten about 200 emails/facebook posts/blogs wishing me a happy birthday. I spent some extra time that morning and curled my hair, wore my favorite sweater and was ready for a happy day. Hubby texted me and told me to get home by 4, so that we could go to dinner. I got to work and my coworkers had decorated my desk (it's a tradition to do this, and usually I'm the one in charge of remembering bdays and buying a card & balloon). They got me the COOLEST balloon! It's bigger than your standard mylar balloon and it's clear! (I used to collect balloons in high school...Yeah, I'm an oddity of sorts...) I got to leave work a bit early, so I did a bit of shopping. Then went to dinner at Olive Garden with the Hubs. It was really a great day. It doesn't take much.

I spent a good part of Saturday working on my resume. I've finally decided to stop being passive about the whole situation and hoping that it gets better. I sent it to my dad, who gave me some suggestions on improving it, so I'm intending to update it later this week and perhaps start applying for some job openings next week. I'm nervous about it, but I need to at least see what's out there.

Today is 4 months since Opa passed. I still get choked up (and usually in tears) on a pretty regular basis. Songs do it for me a lot of the time. My birthday was kinda tough. But I guess I'm doing better. I talk to him a lot. Especially when I got teary eyed. I do feel his presence and I know he's always listening. So I take those moments to tell him how much I miss him and love him.

Hubby asked to go back to 2nd shift yesterday. He thinks his 1st shift boss is out to get him. I don't know what to think. He has a bad track record with authority figures (as in he pisses off his boss for some stupid shit and gets fired...), so if he thinks the boss might be heading down that road, then I'm supportive of the 2nd shift. I was really liking him on 1st, though. It's nice to spend time with him before bed. And to actually sleep with him at night. And to wake up together. I told him that I would've liked him to stay on 1st, but not if it means that he's going to end up without a job!

I think that's all I've got on news...I may be posting a meme next...We'll see. I really should be working right now. But I'm at a bit of a standstill with work tasks, so meme-ing sounds a lot more interesting. :-)

Christmas Just Isn't What It Used to Be, and then some

Today was Christmas at my parents' house. It was not the best holiday gathering...Not a bad one, just a definite sense of sadness in the air. Hubby and I sat in the living room, chatting with my dad for a bit when we first arrived. After while, he helped her out of bed and we all sat by the Christmas tree, opening our gifts. We all tried to remain light hearted, but Omi was definitely having a difficult time. Little things set her off, and seeing the pain that she was feeling, just made my heart ache.

The last gift that was exchanged was a teeny, tiny little Cardinal ornament from my dad to my mom. My mom and grandparents are pretty avid bird watchers. Opa did everything that he could think of to set up bird feeders where my mom could see the birds from inside the house. He used to call cardinals 'Jose,' after a Cubs player from the 70's whose name was Jose Cardenal. As Omi unwrapped the ornament for my mom, she said 'Look at the cardinal, Jose.' And it just brought tears to my eyes and a lump in my throat. It was a reminder of Opa and the fact that he wasn't physically there with us. I looked away and tried to swallow it. I took a couple of deep breaths and turned back around, hoping no one had noticed. It's Christmas, I don't want to upset anyone, and we were all doing okay....But as Omi showed me the ornament, she looked in my eyes and we both just broke down. We hugged for a few minutes and both tried to compose ourselves. I went outside to get some fresh air and just struggled to get ahold of myself.

I just miss him more than I could ever imagine. Everyone told me that the holidays would be hard, but I didn't know. Each "event" is just harder than I could have guessed. Not having him with us, thinking about how he wasn't there to appreciate something as small as a cardinal ornament...When I stepped outside, Hubby followed me and asked if there was some significance to the ornament. He didn't understand why Omi and I would fall apart because of a bird. I tried to explain it to him, but I don't know if he gets it. I mean, he does. He knows what it's like to have that first holiday without a loved one. But...I don't know. He just deals with loss differently than I do. He's a much more realistic, logical person; whereas I am emotional and feeling. I guess that's part of the difference between men and women.

We moved on from gifts and meltdown mode and had a nice dinner together (my husband, choking the food down the whole time...lol I thought everything was excellent, but Hubby is a bit pickier than I). After dinner, we packed up our things and headed toward home.

Santa (and by Santa, I mostly mean my father) was very good to us this year. He purchased Hubby and I each a $500 bond. It's his way of kinda forcing us to start saving some money. It's good. We need to. He also got me a new flash for my camera and a new book for Hubby to listen to. Omi gave us a Christmas quilt (I will take a pic once I get it on my bed!), along with some baked goodies, a few other hand sewn items (potholders, coasters and pillow cases), some cash and a beautiful windchime that I can't wait to hang outside when the weather gets a bit nicer.

I hate being such a Debbie Downer. I really don't like feeling so low. This is a time to be happy and be with the people that you love. I guess it does make me realize how you truly have to appreciate the time that we DO have with our loved ones. Tell them that you love them. Hug and kiss them and make sure that there's no doubt. Cherish your time. Reach out to the people you love who you might not see or talk to as often as you'd like.

Let me change gears, so I can stop blubbering and end on a happier note...What do you have planned for tonight???? Any big parties??? I sure hope so!

We don't have any plans for tonight. Hubby might stay up til midnight playing his game and I think I'll try and lose myself in a movie or two.

What about resolutions? Do you make them? If so, do you stick to them???

I've never really been one for resolutions. Mostly because I know I won't stick to them. My resolutions always seem to be centered around changing some habit that is deeply ingrained. Let's be honest, huh? Those are not things that I can change overnight. I'm not going to wake up tomorrow morning and be a different person.

But I need something. A motivator. So here are my resolutions for the new year and hopefully for good:

1. I really, truly want to get back to Church. I went to mass one time, had this emotional, heart-lifting experience, and then I never went back. I hate doing things alone. I'm very self conscious. Hubby won't go with me and I don't know anyone here. I think our neighbors go to mass on Sundays. And probably to the church that I went to that one time. I intend to go to mass this Sunday. Maybe Tom & ....his wife whose name I can't remember... will be there.

2. I need to get better about monitoring my blood sugar levels. I'm "pre-diabetic"...Whatever that means. I think it was just a way of allowing me to get insurance, without saying that I'm diabetic. I take a mini shit-ton of medications to monitor my glucose levels. Last time I saw the doc, she gave me a new monitor and said that she could write a prescription for the testing supplies, so that I don't have to pay full price. So, I start testing and then stop like a week later. Why? Because I'm lazy? Or maybe because I don't like seeing the levels higher than they should be. I know that's a terrible reason. It's unhealthy and irresponsible. Hence, it's on my list of resolutions.

3. I NEED to lose weight. I think Hubby is FINALLY on board the baby train with me. But if it's going to happen, I need to grow up. I need to lose a least a little bit of weight. I'm never going to be thin or even just slightly overweight. I'm always going to be fat. I've never really had a major issue with that. But a little less fat might help things happen. JB from work recently told me that she joined a gym and she just does laps in the basketball court, rather than walking on the treadmill. Maybe I'll give that a shot?

I think that's it for my list. Three is plenty. I think the first two will be far less challenging than the last one. I'd like to find a buddy to keep me in line. Someone to meet me at the gym and help hold me accountable.

I hope you all are having a wonderful holiday season. And I hope that I will not have such a heavy heart for Christmas 2010. I wish you all a belated Merry Christmas and a happy and safe New Year!!!

Time flies...

I can't believe it's already been a month since my last post. Time just gets away from me. Especially at this time of year.

Facebook just suggested a friend for me. Someone that I've been sorta looking for for a while now. I did a little creeping on his page. And it makes me wonder how life could have been...

This guy...What shall I call him? Buckle. lol If you knew him back in the day, you'd know why I'm giving him this name. Anyway, he was the older brother of one of my classmates. We got to know one another through a church group and I developed a crush on him in my freshman year of high school (Seriously...I think it'd be easier to count the guys that I didn't have a crush on...). We had a bit of a flirty relationship. He was SUCH a nice guy.

I don't remember what the occasion was, but we were at our church's grade school and Buckle, his brother and I were all hanging out on the playground. Mel was probably there at some point, too. Although I could be lying about that. Buckle and I had been flirting a whole bunch and he offered to drive me home, so my dad wouldn't have to drive out to get me. I had a backback or something, which I'd put in his trunk. When we got to my house, he got out of the car with me to get my bag and kissed me there in the driveway.

I don't know why that relationship never went anywhere. I really liked him a lot. And I got the distinct signal that he felt the same way. I think we talked on the phone a couple times, but that was it. Never a date. Never anything more than that one kiss.

I thought that I'd heard that he'd gotten married a few years ago. And I have to admit that I had a moment of disappointment when I heard that. But now Facebook tells me that he's single.

Not that I'm planning on going anywhere. And frankly, things with my husband are pretty good right now. I think the last year has been the happiest that we've been with one another for a long time. But seeing this old friend show up on FB, it stirs up that thought of 'What if...?' I think on more occasions than I'd like to admit, I find myself thinking about how different my life might have been if I'd made one decision differently.

Oh well. 'What if' will never get me anywhere. Life is what it is, right?

Dressed in costume = lack of motivation

I have a BUNCH of friends who are teachers and so many of them were dreading this day. They have a hard enough time keeping their classes tame on a normal day. Throw in costumes, and it just begs for the students to be distracted.

I feel the SAME WAY today!!! I am completely unmotivated to do ANYTHING! I've checked my email and Facebook about 15 times. The first two hours of my day flew by because everyone was far more interested in the costumes and the fun-ness of the day. But the last 52 minutes have dragged on for seemingly EVER! It's almost lunch time...and then I can wander away for another 20 minutes or so.

I work in an office building, so most people are just dressed in their everyday attire. I guess once you get to a certain age, you don't feel like dressing up anymore? Or maybe you just don't have the time or the energy or whatever the case may be. But I love to dress up. I started working here just over three years ago, along with two other newish employees. One of our coworkers told us that everyone in the office dressed up. He gave examples of what everyone normally dressed as and he convinced us all that we should show up in costume, as well.

I'm sure you can see where this is going...

The three of us showed up in costume and not a single other person on the floor was dressed up. JB & I laughed it off, but the other guy was pissed. He'd dressed as a priest, and as soon as he saw that he'd been duped, he went to the washroom and took it off (obviously he had clothes on underneath his robes).

JB and I have since made it a tradition to dress up every Halloween. That first year, I did the quick and easy cat costume - black shirt & pants, ears, tail & whiskers - not the drawn on with eye liner kind, though. They were plastic and had a little ring, which hooked onto the center of my nose. JB was a referee. The next year, I dressed as a dark fairy. Super fun. Black dress & shoes, red, yellow & black wings, a short black pixy wig, and fun, colorful makeup in black & oranges. JB was preggers that year, days from her due date, so she skipped it. Last year, I was Dorothy from the Wizard of Oz. Omi made me a dress, I had a long reddish brown wig in braids, I had the ruby slippers and even a picnic basket with Toto in it. JB was a flapper girl.

This year, JB had a costume that she felt wasn't work appropriate, so she came up with a second one - a sock hop girl:


Another one of our coworkers finally joined the party and he wore his costume as well:


I decided to go as a witch this year. I like alternating between good and evil characters every year. The evil ones seem to be much more fun - mostly because I get to go crazy with my makeup.Apologies for the shoddy camera work. My phone had a bunch of dust over the eye.




I love my makeup today, but I think I may do it differently tomorrow night (not that I'm going out or anything...I'm just passing out candy to the youngins that come to the house). I mean, you've got one opportunity all year to go crazy, why not???

Happy Halloween, Folks! I hope you all have a great (AND SAFE!!!) time this weekend!!!

It's always about a guy, isn't it?

Wow...Well, if that's not a sign from God, I don't know what is...

I had just typed out this long post about how I broke up with Hubby five months before our wedding because I was head over heels with this guy that I'd met at Thursday night Karaoke.

And then when I went to post it, I received an error and the entire post was gone. Guess I wasn't meant to tell that story...I've got another one, but it's far less interesting. :-)

Hubby's stint on 1st shift ends tomorrow. I can't say that I'm sad. I have decided that I like him best on 2nd shift, and that's where he's going, as of Monday. He works 2-10pm and gets home by 11. I don't have to wake him up in the morning, and he's not waking me up at 4am. I can make whatever I want for dinner and don't have to worry about making a second meal for him. I can go to bed when I want, without feeling like an asshat. If I feel like waiting up for him, I can and I won't be exhausted the next morning. Our weekends won't be jacked up like they are when he's on third shift. Yeah, second shift is by far MY favorite.

He's not so excited about it, though. I actually think he's rather bummed about it. He doesn't have any buddies on that shift. And his friends on his game will all be going to bed around the time that he gets home. The last couple of days, he's been sorta down in the dumps. I think it's a combination of the shift change and the acceptance of some of the household responsibilities. Not that he's taking on any new cleaning jobs, but he's FINALLY taking an interest in our finances, realizing that he needs to be an active part of keeping everything in order. But with that, comes some of the stress of it all. And I think he doesn't really know how to handle it. I don't know what to do to try to help him out of his funk. I tried to ask him last night, when I got home at 6:30 and he was already in bed (!!!). But he didn't want to talk about it. He says he just doesn't feel like he's got anything better to do, so why not just go to bed. He doesn't want to eat dinner. And then I feel like as ass for not wanting to go to bed, but sorry, I need to eat some dinner and relax for a few minutes before going to sleep. I don't mind 9 or even 8, but 6? That's just ridiculous. And frankly, I don't have any real suggestions for things for him to do. Nothing that's exciting enough to get him out of bed, anyway.

Ugh, this story is just boring. Maybe I'll have something more interesting to share tomorrow. When I'm all dressed up for Halloween!!! WOO HOO!!! Love dressing up at work!

Time to go home now! Hasta Manana, Friends!

So...I'm on the hunt...

This week has just been a bad week. I'm ready for the weekend, already!!!

On Monday, we found out that Bossman Bob received a new offer for our company. (To catch up on the whole story, go here, here and here.) The new offer is much closer to what he was asking and it looks like he's going to take it. The three "managers" (who are really just programmers who've been here the longest) and one of the other programmers, who's been with the company for about 6 years, spent most of the day in our conference room, while JB and I worked in the office. When they came back to the office, they told us that basically we're looking at a buyout in the next 60 days or so. So, now the next step is to work with the new company on employment contracts - basically to make sure we all still have jobs. I asked one of the managers (Messy) if he thought this was going to be good or bad and he said that he thought it'd be a good thing for the company and for the software. The company that is buying us is much bigger, has more resources and has a better vision for the future.

JB was more interested in the contract negotiation, though. She asked when we'd be talking about it and Messy simply said that the "group" (the four programmers plus one more programmer who works part time) would be discussing it, but that everyone (the only remaining employees are myself, JB & one other programmer who's been here about a year) would be protected.

So, we both went about our business. Monday came and went. About halfway through Tuesday, the "group" were kind of talking in the office about benefits and whether or not they all approved of this or that. It was the kind of conversation where you know there's something not being said. So, JB went snooping. And very easily found a document that the "group" had put together. This document basically outlined our "demands". In it, the "4.5 core members" of the team would be guaranteed 18 months employment, whereas the "other 3 employees" get a 6 month contract and a chance to train for new roles.

I feel like they're throwing us under the bus. And I also feel like if JB hadn't gone snooping, we never would've known what was coming. She told me she asked one of the other managers this morning (Barbie) about what was going on and Barbie DID tell her about the 18 month/6 month variance. She said that the 5 of them have been with the company for longer and blah blah blah. JB and I have been here for 3 years, doesn't that count for something? I just feel like they're looking out for themselves and if we happen to keep our jobs in the process, that's super duper.

On one hand, if I were in their shoes, I would understand, but since it's my ass on the line, it makes me angry. And it makes me resent them for not looking out for the whole team, like they'd originally said they would. I know I've complained about my job and how I'm bored (and I am), but when it comes down to it, who wants to look for a new job in this shitty economy? Well, I do, since who knows if I'll have a job come next spring.

I called my dad last night and talked with him about the whole thing. He told me (and I was already planning) to update my resume and start looking for new jobs immediately. So, I have. I started doing some preliminary career builder searching last night. I'm going to contact my alma mater and see if they have some sort of placement assistance. It's just incredibly stressful. My dad also pointed out the fact that even though they're asking for six months for us, the buyer might say hell to the no, they get two weeks and then hasta la bye bye.

I need to think positively about the situation. A new job means new opportunities. New friends. Possibly a shorter drive to work. Maybe more moula. It's also terrifying.

By the end of the night yesterday, I was okay, though. I'd come to terms with it, I was psyching myself up about the potential goodness of this change.

Let me rewind just a second. A couple weeks ago, I posted about how I'm on this shitty ass late schedule and I hate it and couldn't wait til I could go back to my regular hours, remember? So, last night, I sent an email to the three managers, basically saying now that it's slowed down, I'd like to go back to the early hours. Messy had already left for the day, so Bouncy told me to remind them today. I send a reminder email this morning, and the response is basically that they want me to work 9-5 (or later) from here on out. WTMF???? I never wanted to work these hours. I got FUCKED because all of a sudden we need later coverage?

As much as I love JB and I'm happy for her that she's going to school and shit, it's her fault. She used to work the late shift and I had the early one. I liked it that way. I hate leaving work at six and not being able to do anything after work. I get home at 7 or later. I seriously cannot get a damn thing done working these hours. So, now that she has an unmovable schedule, I'm stuck with the shit hours. It's just bullshit. It just pissed me off to no end this morning. There's nothing I can do about it. I tried to hint to JB when I told her about it that it might be nice for her to work the late shift when she doesn't have class on T/Th, but she's got a kid at home. I can't ask her to be away from her child every night of the week. And as I'm typing those words, the other side of me wants to say it's HER choice to go to school three/four nights a week. Why do I have to sacrifice for her? Because I'm not a bitch. Because I let people walk on me. Because that's life. Suck it up and eat it.

So....Moral of this pissed off story is...If you know of anyone that's hiring in the Chicagoland area, give me a shout. I'm a smart girl; I learn quickly; I'm good with numbers and grammar. I'm a good team player. And I need a new job...Soon.

I'm still kickin...

I haven't fallen off the face of the earth. And I haven't gone into hibernation (though the idea of it is really, really nice...). I've just been busy sucked into a new tv show. I started watching Rescue Me a couple weeks ago, and have finally watched every episode, including the latest one which aired on Tuesday. I'm so in love with Denis Leary right now. He's not hot...But there's something about him or the character that's so super sexy.

I've actually had shit going on in life, too. Work's been a bit busy, so that's nice. When I don't have time to blog and/or read other blogs while I'm at work, that means I'm actually doing something worthy of being paid. Well, either that or I'm checking Facebook every five minutes for new updates and quizzes and emails from another tv-obsessed friend of mine.

A few weeks ago, some of my girlfriends and I got together for our first book club meeting. It was fantabulous! We went to dinner, where we discussed the book ("My Sister's Keeper" by Jodi Picoult) and then after chatting for a while, went to see the movie in the local theater. We chose our next book ("The Time Traveller's Wife" by Audrey Niffenegger, a Chicago native! Woot! Reppin' the hometown!) and decided that we'd do the same thing for our next meeting - dinner & discussion, followed by a viewing of the movie. I haven't gotten very far in the book. Not that I'm not into it, just that I've been so busy with Tommy Gavin, I haven't had time for reading. Our next book club meeting is on the coming up soon, so I'll have to get on that.

Last weekend, I spent Saturday running errands and pampering myself with a fresh fill on my nails. Spent some "quality time" with Hubby. Twice. lol Sunday, I made some potato salad for a BBQ at a friend's house (which apparently turned out quite well...Everyone seemed to like it. I'll post the recipe some time. SO easy!). I managed to get Hubby to get out of the house and go to the BBQ with me. I didn't really give him an option of saying no. I just told him WE were going. That worked out pretty well. He wasn't the most social person at the shindig...He spent most of the afternoon on the couch, watching Mythbusters, but at least he came with me. He chatted with a couple guys that he's talked to before and tried to at least listen to what was going on. I wish that he was more outgoing sometimes. I feel bad when we go to one of these parties and he puts himself in the loner seat. I like to be in the conversation, rather than standing around on the outside. But when he's with me, I don't want to make his uncomfortable-ness worse by leaving him to fend for himself. So, I stick around and keep him company. Anyway, the BBQ was a great time.

I'm super stoked about this weekend. Tomorrow night, my dad and I are going to a surprise party for the mother of one of my oldest friends (Mouse). I've known Mouse since kindergarten. So, that's like 22 years. Shit. After kindergarten, we never got placed in the same class. I always wondered if they did that on purpose...I assumed so. I mean, there was something like 120 kids in our class, spread between four classrooms. But we didn't let that hinder our friendship. We sat together on the bus and played clapping games like 'Miss Mary Mack' and 'Down, Down Baby'. I'm pretty sure we were laughed at. Whatever. It was fun for us. Every Saturday morning, after I got out of CCD, my dad and I would go pick her up and she & I would go rollerskating. Toward the end of elementary school, we started growing apart. She was hanging out with a different crowd and in junior high, I transferred schools. We lost touch, but then freshman year of high school, I got in contact with her again (gotta love the internet!). She started dating my boyfriend's best friend, and then after we broke up with those boys, we still continued to hang out. However, in high school, things started getting a little crazy. There were some incidents that involved beer and cigarettes and boys. Oh, the plethora of boys.

Since then, we've had this relationship where we drift in and out of one another's lives. But I've always considered her a friend. She was supposed to go to a wedding with me a couple months ago and while that didn't pan out, she did invite me to her mom's 60th bday party, which is where I started with this whole thing. She invited me and a guest, which was supposed to be Hubby, but he has to work. And the whole anti-social thing...So, I asked my dad to go with me. I'm pretty stoked about the whole thing. I got THE CUTEST DRESS which I'll pair with a white, short-sleeved sweater, brown wedge sandals and this incredibly hot piece of jewelry, which I can't find on the FB website. I'll try to take a pic tomorrow. I'm kind of excited to have a night out with my Dad. I've always been Daddy's Little Girl and it'll be nice to have a dinner with him that he doesn't have to prepare first. I doubt that we'll know anyone else there, but it's cool. Should be fun.

Saturday, we're driving out to Pontiac, IL, for what's referred to as the Dinks Rally. It's a motorcycle/camping...thing... Something that Hubby grew up doing and his mom still does. It'll be about a three hour drive for us. I haven't been to this rally before, but apparently they do funny games and there's a band and sounds like a good time. Hubby says there should be a couple hundred people there. I just hope the weather cooperates. It's supposed to be stupid hot again, but if it isn't too muggy, I can probably deal. I think I'm going to lug the camera with me. I'm not usually one for participating in stuff, especially stuff that's going to result in me looking stupid, but I'm always up for capturing OTHER PEOPLE making fools of themselves. :-)

We'll camp Saturday night (that's the tentative plan...Hubby may put the kabash on that, depending on the weather) and then drive back home on Sunday morning. The rest of Sunday will probably be spent recuperating, and then back to the grind on Monday.

Anyway...I started this post thinking it was going to be short and sweet...Saying I'm still alive and this blog will soon return to it's regularly scheduled blathering. But apparently, I just had too much to say to keep it all in! I think I've expelled all I have for now. Hope everyone has a fantabulous weekend!!!

How Hubby Came to be Hubby, Pt. 2

Find Part One here!

One night, after dropping B (the high school sweetheart) off at home, and having nothing better to do, I drove around for a while and then called C (now Hubby). I asked what he was doing and if he wanted to hang out. He said he was grounded, but that I could come over if I wanted to. I decided that I would and showed up at his house 15 minutes later. His mom wasn't home and he didn't want to bring me in the house, due to the grounding. So we sat on the front porch, talking while it got dark out. Every once in a while, his dad would holler out the window that he was grounded and needed to say goodnight. C would beg for a few more minutes and we'd continue to talk.

It was a cool fall night and had just started to drizzle a bit. He was sitting behind me on the front steps and had been rubbing my neck and shoulders (when you're 17, this is apparently the best move ever. I wish he'd rub my effing neck every once in a while now...I could really use some stress relief now and then!) and I can remember holding my hair up, out of the way, so he'd stop pulling my GD hair. lol And then he kissed my neck. And that apparently opened the floodgates and was the perfect way to get me to turn around and kiss him back. Even now, as soon as he puts his face in that crook of my neck, all bets are off.

We kissed in the rain for a while and then his dad had had enough. It was time for C to go inside and me to go home. Of course I liked it, but I was ashamed that I'd just kissed another boy while I was with B. I felt guilty and just flat out shitty about it, so I tried to cut off ties with C. I stopped calling him and when he'd call the house and someone else would answer, I'd ask them to tell him I wasn't home. I started referring to him as "Stalker C," but that didn't change the fact that after teaching CCD on Saturday mornings, I'd usually drag Mel over to MickeyD's where he worked, so I could pretend like I didn't like feeling his eyes on me. And it didn't stop the fact that I'd drive by his house whenever I was out cruising, hoping maybe he'd be outside and see me drive by. Now that I think about it, maybe I was the stalker...:-/

After a while, though, I think C got the hint and stopped calling. And we stopped going to MickeyD's and he mostly disappeared off my radar. I still drove by his house on occasion. But that wasn't special for him...I drove by a lot of boys' houses. What? There's not a whole lot else to do when you're 17 and living in a small town.

B and I broke up in March of my senior year (completely and totally unrelated to C). And prom was slowly creeping up on me. Being newly single, I didn't know what to do. I considered calling C and asking him, but ended up going with another friend instead. I graduated from high school, got accepted to a college about an hour from home and was working a part time job at the mall that summer. I was having a good time dating (I use that term loosely...It was more like screwing) a few guys and I was not really looking for a boyfriend. I was happy to be on my own for the first time since I was 13.

And then, one day in August, I was driving home from work and noticed a shiny black car going around the corner, as I waited for the light. I mean, who doesn't notice a nice clean car and hope that some cute boy is going to be driving it? And also hope that said cute boy might notice me and smile. As soon as the car completed its turn, I saw C in the driver's seat, and he saw me. We locked eyes for a moment and I knew that he'd be calling me later that day. And sure enough, by the end of the night, he'd managed to remember my phone number and gave me a call.

The rest of that summer was spent with early morning breakfast dates (he worked overnights - got off at 6am and would call and wake me up for breakfast at the ass crack of dawn...The stupid things we do for boys that we like...) and little white lies to my parents about where I was spending the night (Mel, you may or may not have been my cover story a few times...).

Today is our 9 year "anniversary". On August 7, 2000, after a day spent probably hanging out at C's house, watching Who Wants to Be a Millionaire and a dinner of Tuna Helper (*GAG*), he drove me home and we sat in his car, in the street, all of the front windows of the house blocked by the large evergreen in the front yard. C thought tickling was cute, and as I bucked and pushed to get him to stop, I punched him square in the lip. Tickling ceased immediately. And he says 'Now I'm going to have to go to work and explain to everyone how my girlfriend gave me a fat lip.' I looked at him and asked 'Girlfriend?' and that was that.

Just a note, you'd think he'd learn that when we wrestle, he's the one that's always going to get hurt. When I'm defending myself, I'm not going to hold back, fat lips, ripped eyebrow rings, bruises, Indian burns, scratches and the like have been his fate. But that's another story for another day.

Anyway, Happy "Anniversay" Hubby.

Not that I'd EVER encourage you to read my blog...I'm just sayin...:-)

The story of how Hubby came to be Hubby, Part 1

I met Hubby when I was 16...Eleven years ago. I was at a high school football game with Spunky (previously mentioned here as the best man at another friend's wedding). I dont think that I ever actually watched a football game when I was there. It was more about the atmosphere and being with my friends. Seeing what everyone was up to and who was making out with who. And the night that I met Hubby was no different.

Spunky and I were meandering around and ran into our friend, whom I will refer to as Bennet. Bennet was there with his friend C, now known as Hubby. So, we chit chat for a while with Bennet & C, and then C starts trying to act like he's got game. He was apparently trying to teach Bennet how to be slick with the women, by demonstrating on me - the only female in the group.

He starts getting close and rubbing my shoulders. Did the whole whisper-in-the-ear thing. Whatever a 17 year old boy (definitely was still a boy at that point in time) can come up with. And I have to admit - I LOVED the attention. Some guy that I'd just met was seemingly all into me. It didn't matter that he was just "showing Bennet how to flirt." I was the center of attention and what girl doesn't love that?? I did have a boyfriend at the time, but he could never go out on Friday nights - family commitments - so while I did feel a bit guilty, I was mostly not concerned with that. At the end of the night, C whispered something to Spunky about me, and refused to tell me what it was. I blew it off, knowing Spunky would fill me in later. We said our goodbyes and I figured that was it. Spunky and I went back to my car and he immediately told me that C had said something vulgar about the degree of moisture in my pants and how he'd be the cause and that totally ruined the whole experience. I was so irritated and didn't mind if I never saw the guy again...Or at least that's what I said.

A month or two later, C showed up at the play that our high school was doing (Spunky, Bennet & I all went to one school - C went to another. Bennet & I were involved with the theater. C came to support Bennet.) and during intermission, I was in the lobby selling baked goods. C noticed me and came up and started talking. He asked for my phone number and for whatever reason, I decided to give it to him. That began a series of long, late-night phone calls (for which I usually got in a lot of trouble. The rule was no phone after 9pm. C and I often talked til 1 or 2 in the morning.). I liked talking to him. He was always very flirty and made me feel great about myself. Very early on, he began telling me that one day he'd marry me. Don't go thinking he's some psychic...He was just saying whatever he could to get me to stay on the phone with him a little longer. While we continued to have these long phone chats, I still was dating B, though I doubt that he knew about my "friendship" with C. That being said, I always made it very clear to C that I loved B and that I was intending to marry B. C didn't care. He was, if nothing else, persistent.

More to come soon...