In my last two years of college, I had a HUGE crush on a guy that I knew very little about. He was in the business frat on campus and I met him in my first semester while pledging my sorority. Once a semester, we had Greek Week. Every night of the week, there were events like kareoke, an obstacle course & tugs, in which each of the Greek organizations competed. At the end of the week, the winners got to hold their heads high and announce that they were the best and the losers had a 'punishment' that would take a whole separate blog post to explain. It wasn't anything terrible. Just more annoying than anything else.
Anyway, I met Wally during Greek Week. At the time, his 'big brother' was dating one of my soon-to-be sisters. I had to do an interview with her, and the guys just kinda hung out while that was going on. Wally was a charmer right off the bat. I don't remember his exact words, but it had something to do with my smile & being an angel. Wally's 'game' = corny, however, me = swoon. It was just the way he said things and that gorgeous smile and friendly demeanor. After talking with some friends that actually knew him, they confirmed that he was just an all around nice guy. And from what I heard, he was always getting the whole 'You're such a good friend' spiel. I instantly wanted to love him. I'm generally pretty outgoing when I have friends around to back me up. But when I'm in the presence of a guy that I'm attracted to, I become a wallflower. I can't find words, hell, I can't even make eye contact. I'm quite positive that Wally forgot all about me after that brief encounter.
The rest of that year, I saw him around every once in a while, but never talked. Just smiled at him and kept on walking. I mean, I was in a relationship. Wearing a five year old engagement ring on my finger. I wasn't really in any position to stop and try to get past my jitters for a little flirting action. That summer came & went and then in the fall, I didn't see him around anymore. I heard from a friend who knew every living person on campus that he'd gone to Europe for a semester. When he came back the following spring, I saw him on a pretty regular basis. That same friend and I would smoke together before one of our classes began and he started hanging out with us for this ten minute smoke break. She'd talk with him and I'd interject every once in a while. And as soon as he was gone, I'd melt. I think ALL of my sisters knew that I wanted to love Wally. As we continued to have our meetings, he shared that while he'd been on this trip to Europe, he'd fallen for a girl from...some other state...that was on the same exchange program that he was. They were planning on getting married and that spring, while I was pining over him, he was counting down the days til his wedding.
Last night, I had a dream about Wally. Intermingled with the cast from The Office. lol I had befriended a girl who was seeing him - apparently in my dream, he never got married. She and I became friends before I knew that they were dating. And in becoming friends, I confessed to her my crush on him. And then later in the dream, she tells me that they're kind of seeing one another. I told her I was happy for her and that she should have nothing to worry about with me. It's just a crush, and besides, I'm married. She gave me a sideways glance and was all 'Suuuuurrrre.'
In the dream, she and I were working side by side and Wally was on the other side of the room. At one point, I got up from my desk to go to another room, where all the Office people (namely Dwight) were working. As I was leaving the room, I heard Wally say something to the girl (I gave her the name Kate, when I woke up and was going over this whole thing in my head). He said 'Yeah, now that I look at her, she is quite beautiful.' I kept walking and immediately blushed. That's about where my dream ended. I woke up feeling like, man, if only I'd let him know I was interested before that Kate got in the way. lol
I don't know what he thought about me in real life. I don't know if he even knew that I existed. Like I said, I became Little Miss Tightlips whenever he was around. I do wonder sometimes how life would be different if I'd opened my mouth and said hello. Would I have ended up in the same place that I am now? Or would Prince Charming have swept me off my feet into a totally different life?
Don't misread this - I love my husband and I'm not looking for someone better to come along. We've got our issues, but what's important is that we love one another. We've made vows to one another and that's that. But sometimes, especially when Prince Charming creeps into my dreams, I like to wonder about what might have been.
Does anyone else do this? I mean, say you're content with your life. There are some things that you'd change, but not enough to be unhappy. Do you dream about what could have been if you'd made a different decision? Have any of you ever acted on that feeling of 'What if?' Share your juiciness!
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